


When the Roots are Deep

by Kaz323



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: AU where I ignore everything going on in cannon, Aftermath of Traveller Con 3000, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Background Relationships, Campaign 1 (Critical Role), Campaign 2 (Critical Role), Character Death, Cross campaign interactions, Eventual Relationships, F/F, F/M, M/M, Spoilers for Campaign 2, Temporary Character Death, there's a lot of analysis on unrequited feelings in future chapters, this is mostly just me doing analysis on characters
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-09
Updated: 2021-02-03
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:46:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 6
Words: 21,423
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27974648
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kaz323/pseuds/Kaz323
Summary: The only member of the Mighty Nein that actually heard her soft whisper was Fjord, who had his arms tightly wrapped around her. "Okay." He didn't even have time to process it before he was falling into the base of the volcano. Days after, the Nein are still scrambling for a plan to get her back.An AU which Jester agrees to go to the Feywild with Artagan, where her strength check succeeds and the M9 have to reach out to the people who got Artagan out in the first place.
Relationships: Beauregard Lionett/Yasha, Caduceus Clay & Fjord, Fjord/Jester Lavorre, Mollymauk Tealeaf/Caleb Widogast
Comments: 20
Kudos: 76





	1. I won't be seen at any cost cause if I'm found, I'll end up lost

Fjord didn’t want to get up. He had every ache he had ignored for months resurface as he laid in his blankets. It might have seemed morbid, but he didn’t know why he should get up at all. They deserved more than a break, and maybe he should just stop for a bit. However when he closed his eyes, he saw a bright blue, freckles, dimples, tears. He could still hear the shaking in her voice, begging for her oldest friend. Before he could hit the point where he was plummeting, he opened his eyes, the grey of Caleb’s dome vanished around them.

Everyone else was already sitting up, mumbling conversation. Beau made a small nod to him while shoving stale bacon into her face. “So what we know is that a Plane Shift spell won’t work,” she said, going back into the conversation easily.

“What else can we do?” Veth looked between Caleb and Caduceus. The hope was that the wizard had a plan.

“I do not have any spells I can use to help her.”

Caduceus hummed. “I can try to pray to the Wildmother, but I don’t know how it will go trying to undo another god’s wishes.”

Beau shifted. “Okay. In the meantime, she mentioned that he like had a punishment before, right? Like he escaped or something?” 

Caleb hadn’t looked up from the ground. His arms were folded in front of him, curled inward. He stared forward. “He has fled from his binds before. He will be dragged back to the Fey where he once came, and dragged back as intended.” He said the words exactly, a slight horror in his hollow voice.

“Yeah, so he escaped once, right? We need to look into it, and- maybe  _ just  _ maybe- we can help him do it again.”

Caleb glanced up at that. It was hard to read his expression as his mouth was shut into a thin line. It was obvious he was planning something in that intelligent wizard head. “Should I take us to Zadash?”

Fjord nodded. “We start there. We’ll get her back.”

The whole group nodded in a silent agreement, and after giving every single person a look over, he started to sketch out a teleportation sigil. During this time, Caduceus went about twenty feet away, coming back a minute later with an obvious frown on his face. It was just the same as it had been done before. He wasn’t sure why he expected something different to happen during the transport, but the light flashed as they appeared in the Cobalt Soul Library in Zadash. 

Ultimately Caduceus decided to stay with them in the library while all of them attempted to stay focused in reading about Artagan. Beau seemed to be leading the investigation quite well as both him and Yasha delivered books to Veth, Caleb and Beau. Every once and a while, one of them would bring in a new piece of information, and Beau would jump up and look back through the notes she had been making. While the information they were finding was all about Artagan and the crimes he had committed to get him locked into the Fey. In reality, it was fascinating to think that Jester had been the one to draw his attention. Fjord would have smiled at the thought of small mischievous Jester causing chaos and making an ancient powerful being fascinated in  _ her _ .

It wasn’t too long before his restless energy started to consume him. He was slamming books down hard enough to cause Veth to jump and reach for her crossbow. It was the pacing, Fjord thinks, that caused Caduceus to finally stand up, grabbing his shoulder. “Let’s take a walk.”

Veth was the only one to acknowledge them. “Alright,” she said curiously.

It was kind of infuriating at how calm Caduceus was. Normally, it was the exact reason he would go to the firbolg. He knew there was a sense of comfort whenever he was feeling hysterical. Anything that had made him feel suffocated, mostly the things with Uk’otoa and Avantika, Caduceus was always like a fresh breath of air. It was almost like coming out of being taken by Lorenzo, there was a bright light allowing him to take steps away from the guilt and the desperate attempt to control himself and others around him.

After walking a good block away from the library, he finally snapped. “What are you looking for?”

“I’m just waiting for you.”

“I don’t really know what you want me to say. I’m angry, and I’m not good at this book stuff. I’m angry that I had her in my arms and then-” he tried to release the tension building in his chest, but it only started to climb up his throat. 

“Everything you did was right.”

“I don’t know what else I could have done.”

Caduceus made a low hum. “I hope that you know that this isn’t the end to this story. Like many of our adventures so far, this is only the beginning. You being there for her in that moment was a miracle in and of itself, even if it didn’t fix everything.” A large grey hand curled it into his ever growing fluorescent beard. “Fixing things is far too much for any person.” Another pause. “However, I do think that when we get the next chance, your good efforts will have an important effect on her.”

Fjord couldn’t help but laugh at that. “She decided to go anyways.”

Caduceus was also smiling. “Just because you have an effect on someone doesn’t mean that you can control them. I like to think I’ve had an effect on you, and the amount of times you’ve taken me by surprise, I’m not sure I could count to.” 

“You’ve definitely had an effect on me,” he all but whispered. He wasn’t sure why his voice got so soft. Maybe it was a reminder to Cad, maybe it was a reminder to himself. 

“Even if you can’t tell immediately, your support was appreciated by her, I guarantee it,” Cad insisted. They kept walking, not paying attention to any destination. “I’m more interested in how you’re feeling right now.”

His stomach churned, trying to process and pay attention to Caduceus’ words. “I’m angry,” he said, “at myself, and if I’m fully honest, probably a bit at her.”

There was no reaction other than a slow nod. He waited to hear more.

The words came out slowly, as if he were still learning to speak. “I was wrapped up in myself for a very long time, I ignored the needs of my team- my family- Veth’s feelings and fears, Yasha’s anger, Beau’s aggression towards herself and her future, Caleb’s-” he searched for the right words, careful because he knew Caleb had told him about his past in confidence and that Caduceus could easily read between the words. “Caleb’s trauma, even your goals Caddy, and Jester-” there was another long pause. “Her lack of self preservation for the sake of her friends.”

There was an odd passion about his venting about his friends. In reality, it was more of a frustration about himself. He ran his hands through his hair in a desperate attempt to do something with himself. “Remember when she jumped off a ledge after Nott? Or even with the hag, going in there with such a reckless plan without telling us?” He groaned. “In the end, she’d do anything for us, but it doesn’t  _ compare _ to the things she would do for The Traveller.” He shook his head. “And maybe part of me is jealous because as much as I want to have that level of loyalty, I haven’t felt that until now.”

He sighed. He wasn’t sure when he was sat in a small grass segment on the edge of the city. There was a heaviness in all of his limbs that continued to catch up to him and he could only sigh at both his frustration and admiration for their currently missing tiefling. 

“Well, we can’t help any of that right now. Not yet, but when we get her back we can address it. For now, is there any question you would like to ask the Wildmother?”

“Commune?”

“If you think it would help.”

Fjord sucked in a breath. He had an important question, one that he feared the answer to.

Caduceus set up things from his pack to help create a small altar between them. It took time, all the while Fjord continued to fantasize about negative outcomes until it was ready, which Caduceus finally looked up and nodded. “Alright.”

Fjord closed his eyes, trying to focus on smaller elements of his environment, the temperature or the small wind. “Is she safe?”

Caduceus relayed the question, also closing his eyes. Both of them felt a warm breeze flow through the air, however there was a reluctance. “As well as she can be, I suppose.”

Fjord frowned. “Can we get her back?”

Another confirmation, one with much more clarity. 

It was hard to understand Caddy’s last question when his mind was reeling. She was safe. These efforts weren’t useless. They were going to make it through this. She was going to make it through this. A soft uncertain chill followed the last question, which Fjord couldn’t be sure as to what it was.

It felt very similar to when Caduceus first started leading him through meditation. He didn’t really understand it at first. Settling himself down felt like he was giving into his consciousness. At some point, it clicked. He wouldn’t deny having sleep issues when the dreams had started, and he was worried about allowing another being into his head. However, when he finally allowed himself to be taken back, it wasn’t a punishment or an order. It was an invitation to return to the place where he lived out some of the best years of his life. In his little attempt for more control, he sold himself away. Luckily, he had a family to catch him now.

He got lost in time when he was connecting to the Wildmother. It was always a similar experience to standing at the bow of a ship. Incredible waves with soft splashes of salt water spraying his skin. The feeling where he knew that even so far from any coast, there was the sense of stability in who he was and where he came from.

He opened his eyes only to find Caduceus with eyes still closed, breathing even. The sun would be setting in the next hour or so, giving the indication they had been meditating for a good portion of the day. It was nice to be able to stop and take in a moment with the firbolg. The sense of admiration and gratitude sputtered. 

“Are you ready to head back to the others, Mister Fjord?”

Fjord jumped at the sudden acknowledgement. “How did you know I was done?”

“Your breathing stopped.”

Fjord felt himself flush. “Oh.”

They made their way back to the library where Beau was all but jumping on the table with excitement. Everyone seemed to be chiming in every once and awhile, yet the energy was still palpable. “So if we find them, we can get answers.”

As he got closer, Fjord spoke up, “what are we doing now?”

“So back like a little under 20 years ago, we were all kids, the war with Vecna. It was like a big deal, but Wildemount didn’t get answers until much later, we’ve got heads up our asses a little bit. Anyways, the heroes that saved the day had an agreement with Artagan to help do some time control when they went to the Feywild with their tails between their legs, right? They made a deal to create a doorway for him to cross through. As far as we know, the doorway should still be there, we just need to know how to open it.”

“So who are these people?”

“Vox Machina,” she said. “We don’t know who most of their members are because most of them wanted to live out more peaceful lives.”

“Probably don’t wish to be harassed by adventurers like us,” Veth points out.

“Yeah sure, but they get to deal with us anyways,” Beau was quick to snap back.

They shifted only for a moment before Beau was back onto it. “There’s only one member that we have a real name for is Taryon Darington.”

Caleb’s head popped up at that. “That is familiar.”

“What do you mean?” Fjord asked.

“The Daring Trials and Tribulations of Sir Taryon Darington,” he said with perfect recollection. “Pumat was reading that book a long time ago. He said that he ordered it from Deastok.”

Beau’s groan was immediate. “We were  _ just _ over there.”

“This time we have no need to go visit your father,” Caleb said.

They all made a few nods.

“So do we head out from here?” Beau made no attempt to hide her disdain for the idea of travelling.

“Ah actually, I believe I have something that could help,” Caleb went on to explain his new spell and the fact that it takes risks depending on how familiar he is with the location. Step one: get there.


	2. Things can move at such a pace, the second hand just waved good-bye

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yasha POV. An introduction to a member of Vox Machina, the Nein get one step closer to finding their friend(s). 
> 
> There are mentions of mental breakdowns. Nothing too descriptive, just remember to stay safe just in case.

It was much more of an ordeal to get there. The first second they left, they ended up somewhere far north closer to the Zemni Fields. Yasha took note of how Caleb stared outside of the dome when they took watch.

While they made it to the outside of Deastock the next day, all of them were lodged inside stone walls. While they were forced out, it was odd to feel your body parts rebuilt and immediately shoved from a solid surface. Fjord immediately keeled over, looking pekid.

Despite being a little disoriented, the Nein gained a little bit of a grip and went through the town. None of them had really been to Deastok, although Beau was familiar with it. It was lucky none of them were caught by guards trying to teleport into the city. They made their way to the center of town where most of the traffic was. It wasn’t hard to pull someone aside and ask for the Darrington residence. 

It didn’t look like the Darringtons spent a lot of time on upkeep at the rusting window seels and the weathered bricks. There were clear training grounds across the front yard. Two figures, one pale with a sense of luminescence across their skin, and another with bright red hair tied back tightly with a ribbon. Their conversation stopped as the Nein carefully walked towards the door. It felt out of place to just knock on the door, but no one seemed to have any better ideas. Caleb and Fjord stepped up to the front of the group. 

Eventually, someone came to the door. Another giant half-orc, as if this ordeal wasn’t already a test to his patience. “Uh, hello,” he seemed to be trying to catch his thoughts up with his mouth. “Are we uh- expecting you?”

“No, we’re surprise visitors looking for Sir Taryon Darrington.”

He nodded, “are you new recruits? Or do you need some help?”

Fjord frowned. “Um, no?” The confusion in his voice was obvious by how he nearly raised an octave on the singular word.

Yasha made a glance at the others, and caught Beau mouthing ‘recruits?’ Veth made a large shrug

“Alright, I can see if he can come talk to you. Who are you guys?” he said, opening the door to lead them inside. 

“We are the Mighty Nein and we need some assistance,” Caleb said. 

“So just come inside for a bit,” he brought them into a small sitting area. 

Fjord, Caleb and Veth settled in on one of the couches, Beau and Yasha stood behind. Caduceus sat on the seat perpendicular to them. “So do we just ask him about Artagan, then?” Beau asked.

Fjord frowned. “I guess that would be all we can do.”

“What if he doesn’t want to tell us? What if he’s a major dick-”

“We have to hope that there are good people who will help us, Beauregard,” Caleb interjected. At some point, Yasha noticed that Caleb stopped spending time on the what ifs. At some point, he started becoming more driven and less held back by his anxieties. However, it didn’t help his impulsivity.

Yasha saw Beau wince for a moment and immediately tried to cover it up. Yasha reached down and grabbed her hand, and was rewarded with a soft squeeze from the monk. Beau didn’t look at her, only having the stoney expression staring forward.

It took far too long for another person to enter, and a singular word to describe him was bright. Not in the way that her old friend was, rather than filled with color, it was almost like looking at the sun compared to an art mural. However, something was clearly off in his lifted face, similar to the way that Frumpkin looks compared to a real cat.

“Ah, hello! I am Sir Taryon Gary Darrington, founder of the Darrington Brigade and author of The Trials and Tribulations of Sir Taryon Darrington. I was hoping you were my manager returning to my estate. Alas, you are not,” he cleared his throat. “How can I help you?”

“Well, we’re here to ask you some questions about your adventures,” Fjord said.

“Oh! Are you fans of my book?” He barely even waited for a response before. “Or some sort of journalist looking to applaud my accomplishments?”

Yasha could feel Beau’s whole body stiffen next to her. 

“No- but we do applaud the things you have been through, we have specific questions about your time with Vox Machina.” As always, Fjord tried to take lead in the conversation, which everyone preferred. She would joke about being the face of the party, but every time she saw Fjord in his element, she was grateful it wasn’t her responsibility.

“Ah, but of course.”

“We were wondering about the encounter with Artagan, a fey. From our research, they created a doorway-” Caleb stepped in.

Taryon’s head tilted, and the smile quickly faded. 

“We need to find that doorway.”

He clicked his tongue. “Lucky for you, I know what you're talking about. Unlucky for you, I wasn’t present for any of Vox Machina’s encounters.” 

Beau let out a huff, and Taryon made a pointed look at her.

“I do know people that would probably speak with you, but I must know before I send you in their direction, why?” None of the Nein responded, and Taryon tried again. “I want to help you in whatever you are doing, I sense some good people. However, valuable information that I have collected over time cannot just be spread around to anyone willing to listen.”

“You wrote a book about your exploits,” Beau said, finally adding to the conversation.

There wasn’t anything that was making Yasha unnerved, but it was clear that Beau wasn’t the same. It was just after that when she snatched her hand away from Yasha and folded it in front of her chest, guarded. 

Taryon only responded in an uncomfortable laughter before Caleb broke in again, “we understand the worry, we’ve had our trust and goodwill betrayed before.”

Yasha knew that he was primarily referring to Essek. She knew, yet her insides still responded with a sickly pain in her stomach. Essek was nothing compared to her betrayal.

“We’re doing this for our friend. Artagan has made quite an influence since being on the Material plane. When he was banished back to his plane, she was taken with him.”

Taryon hummed. “Well, that seems worrisome that he had the audacity to kidnap someone.”

“She actually went of her own accord. They have a very long history, but it doesn’t mean we don’t want her back,” Fjord corrected. 

Yasha had her eyes singularly on Beau at this point, staring from the corner of her sight. Her whole expression was seething. Yasha couldn’t deny that Taryon wasn’t a jackass, but there have only been a few times when Yasha had seen Beau so tense with such a silent rage. The most recent example being her father. 

“Well, that seems like a case of bad judgment, I’d say,” Taryon said.

It was almost as if she could hear the snap as Beau slammed her hands down on the couch right behind Fjord’s head, causing a shocked yelp and him to duck. “You don’t get to judge her, you don’t fucking know her. You don’t know what she’s done for us and the loyalty she has to that _bastard_. So maybe you should get off your goddamn high horse, you prick.” She took in one deep breath before running back out of the door and slamming it behind her. There were ricocheting vibrations across the room following her absence. 

Fjord and Caleb both made a move to stand up, but Yasha waved them away. “Give her a moment.”

Yasha made her way towards the door, listening to Fjord apologize. 

“No no, I take no offence, I am quite forgiving. It has been a long time since someone has spoken to me like that.”

“She’s passionate, and if I’m being honest, we’ve all had better days.”

The door closed behind Yasha as she saw Beau making quick punches to one of the dummies already. 

“I think you’d blow off more steam if you had a partner,” Yasha attempted, and immediately regretted her words when Beau paused. “I mean- sparring- fighting not-”

“That’d be great if you’re down,” Beau responded, not giving any attention to Yasha’s growing embarrassment.

Yasha took off her shall and put her hands up. Yasha knew Beau was much faster than her. Beau took a defensive position just before Yasha swung at her, quickly dodging out of the way and quickly jabbing underneath her rib. Her second hit didn’t hurt, and she was slightly thankful for her thick skin. She didn’t really want to hit Beau, so she aimed a little bit wide.

“Don’t go easy on me, Yash,” she said, hitting again below her jaw.

“Okay,” Yasha whispered, finally making contact with Beau’s shoulder, making the monk stumble slightly with a surprised grin starting to spread across her face.

They traded blows for a few minutes without any malice behind it. Yasha, as always, became more grateful to have Beau on her team. The barbarian made a step through Beau’s legs, allowing her to push her back. She wasn’t expecting Beau to tumble towards the dirt, and in a sad attempt to catch her, Yasha fell on top of her.

“I’m so sorry,” she pushed herself up onto her elbows to see Beau’s face, only to see a smile with closed eyes. She was shaking underneath Yasha, trying to contain her laughing. “Am I funny to you?”

That got Beau to open her eyes and stare and through giggles, she replied, “Are you kidding? You’re one of the funniest people I’ve ever met.”

“I’m not kidding,” Yasha said, but couldn’t help smiling with her. Her heart felt like it was unravelling as she watched the pure glee on the other’s face. She didn’t want to get up. She didn’t want to face the trials. In this small moment, she realized what she _did_ want. A similar, but more concrete, feeling compared to the day they took flight together. She wanted to kiss Beau. She wanted to put a finger under her chin and watch the surprised anticipation in Beau’s expression.

Instead, she climbed off of her sparring partner and helped her to her feet.

“I don’t want to go back in there,” Beau said once she got to her feet.

“We don’t have to.”

She pursed her lips, rubbing the back of her head sheepishly. “Uh yeah. You can go in if you want.” She must have thought it was official when she slumped against one of the gates and slid her butt back down to the ground.

Yasha only sat right next to her, giving her almost no room before they’d be touching. “I think I’d rather stay out here.”

“Oh.” she made a careful laugh, and another softer, “oh.” 

They sat in silence for a while. Eventually, Beau must have given into her impulse and leaned her whole weight against Yasha. “Thanks for following me out. I didn’t mean to get so angry in there.”

“You are… Defensive of your friends. It’s nice.”

“Yeah, well. I hope Fjord doesn’t think all of his people's training went to waste on me.”

Yasha almost laughed. “He doesn’t think that.”  
“I don’t like it when I blow up like that.”

“You used to get really mad at Caleb like that.”

Beau snorted. “I did.”

“I think your friendship with him shows that it won’t ruin as much as you think it will. No one is mad at you for being upset.”

Neither of them were looking at each other for this conversation, but Yasha could feel Beau shift so her face was slightly buried in her arm. “I’ve gotten a lot better at keeping my cool.”

“That’s good because I haven’t.”

Another snort. “I think you might know how to utilize it better.”

“Sometimes, maybe.”

Yasha could feel Beau’s expression change into a bit more of a smile. “No, really. It’s something I really admire about you. You’re amazing, Yasha.”

Yasha buried the instinct to deny it and bring up all of the things she had done that prove it wrong. She didn’t want to insult Beau’s judgement. It was a bit of an argument between herself, and instead decided not to respond, not trusting herself enough to.

Beau sighed eventually. “I hope Jester’s okay.”

“She might not be right now, but she will be soon.”

“Before Caddy got a message to her, I honestly thought she might’ve died or something.” Pause. “It sounds stupid when I say it outloud.”

Yasha shook her head. “No, I get it. When you all went missing on the ship, I was very afraid.” She remembered the first time she had this conversation, and she remembered being frustrated with not being able to get her point across. She had gone over the words of how she felt in her head multiple times after that, wishing she had said something else to express her feelings. “I was hoping you left me behind. Even though it made me sad, it was better than the alternative.”

“I wish we didn’t leave you. It was an accident, sure, but I wish you were there.” 

“There has been a lot I haven’t been here for.” Between her calling from the Stormlord, the Happy Fun Ball and Obann, there was so much that she had missed.

“Do you think you’re going to leave again?” Pause. “Anytime soon, at least?”

“No, I would like to stay, and it is one of the first real decisions I think I had made after Obann.” 

“I’m glad,” Beau croaked. 

It was about then when their friends exited the building. “I wish you all the best of luck, and I’ll give them a heads up about your arrival. She’s an amazing person, but don’t let her intimidate you too much.”

“Thank you so much,” Fjord continued with polite banter before the door finally shut.

“Where are we headed, Captain?” Beau jumped up away from Yasha.

“Vasselheim.” 

They made it back to Zadash that night. They had a a few days before the couple they were supposed to meet up with would make it there. Apparently, the entirety of Vox Machina were aware of each other’s whereabouts. Beau suggested the idea that they had some sort of shared calendar. 

Fjord went on a shopping trip with Veth. Caleb and Beau went back to the library. Caduceus had been messaging Jester and communing with the Wildmother, and with the upcoming storm, Yasha decided to join him.

It wasn’t long before it started to rain, but neither of them made a move to get up from their meditation. “This feels like a warning,” Caduceus said. 

Yasha nodded in response as lightning flashed somewhere to the south. While Yasha wouldn’t say that it was necessarily bad thing. Her reactions to the stormlord usually resolved around reaching for her own support and finding a way to stand tall. She looked up, squinting through the droplets going down her face. It was a reminder to stay present.

They gathered back at the inn. Beau and Caleb seemed defeated from their research, not really gleaming anything new. Fjord and Veth divided up healing potions between the group. They bought dinner and their conversation seemed to be a little more lively now that they had a goal. 

“Tomorrow we can make our way to another continent,” Caleb said, liting his drink up. Despite the lack of the tieflings, it had an echo of when the Nein first gathered together. Hopping from tavern to tavern.

They were mid conversation when Caduceus lifted his head up, eyes wide with a curious glance. “I’m not sure. I don’t know anything about that, but I’ll ask the others.That’s weird.” 

The whole group waited to for Caduceus to explain, and eventually his head shook at he looked back around to the others.

“I just got a message from my sister. Reani found something in Shadycreek, a note from the Mighty Nein. Something about tea leaves? She got it from one of her missions on the slavers there.”

Beau’s head immediately snapped to Caleb and Veth. “It’s him.”

“Possibly.”

“Well, we left it in his coat, right? They could have just gotten it from that.” Veth said.

Caleb shook his head. “No, we left it in his clothing that he was wearing.”

“Oh,” it was a breathy realization as Veth sat back completely agape.

“What are you guys talking about?” Fjord said. “I’m not the only one who is completely lost to this conversation, right?” 

“I’m lost,” Yasha said.

“Me too,” Caduceus added.

It was easy to identify the guilt on all three of their faces. Veth had her knees curled up into herself on the bench, lips out in a small pout. Beau tilted her head and rubbed the back of her neck. By how she was tensing her jaw, Yasha could pretty much feel the grinding of teeth for herself. Caleb sunk into the collar of his coat. His expression was the same, except the lowered eyebrows.

“We left a note to Molly in his clothes. In case he crawled his way out of the grave.” Beau finally said.

That didn’t make any sense. “Molly can’t read.”

“What- No, that’s not important,” Caleb corrected himself. “Either Mollymauk crawled his way out of the grave a second time or he was unburied only to have his belongings stolen.”

“But he could be alive?” Yasha whispered. Beau, Caduceus and Caleb all made long looks at her, each of them with different intents. She couldn’t really understand what emotion each of them were trying to convey, but it made her want to shrink back up.

“We’re not seriously suggesting prioritizing Molly over Jester,” Veth said, frowning and crossing her arms over her stomach. 

“Of course not,” Beau cut in, looking at Yasha. “We still need to go check it out, though.”

Caleb nodded. “I could get us there tomorrow. Do we have anything we acquired from Shadycreek? Or even your home Caduceus?”

Caduceus nodded, but before he could bring anything out, Yasha pulled the Magician’s Judge out from where it normally stayed on her back. It was always odd to take it out and feel the weight off of her back. “Will this work?"

"We didn't get that from the Shady Creek, though." Caleb frowned.

"No we didn't, but we got it back from them, right?" Yasha asked.

“Yes, this will do, I think. It was reacquired, I suppose. Bring it out tomorrow? I’m unsure if I can hold this on my own.” Caleb made a small smile at her, and Yasha couldn’t help but grin and put it back away. She enjoyed Caleb’s joke about his strength. Somehow whenever Caleb made a joke, it just suited her sense of humor very well.

“Alright,” she said.

“Okay, we’re meeting up with this couple in what, two days in Vasselheim? What if we go to Shadycreek and it takes more than a few days? What do we do then?” Veth asked.

“I think we’ll go, assess the situation, and come back to it if we cannot handle it before we get Jester back,” Caleb said. 

Eventually, they agreed on that statement after uselessly debating what ifs. Caduceus sent a message to Reani, having her meet them in Shadycreek. Yasha turned in early, a little baffled by the revelations that had happened.

She loved the Nein, and she was unbelievably grateful for their affect on her life. Losing Molly had a lasting effect on the group. They agreed to build themselves together. Now that she had grown into a more confident, more capable, more loving person, she couldn’t look to him, and while she wasn’t constantly suffering from all of the loss she experienced, it felt like a goal they were supposed to reach together. She’d turn and he wouldn’t be there.

From what she knew, the sleeping arrangement would be Caleb and Fjord, Beau and Nott, so that left Caduceus with her.

She leaned over, taking the bed further from the door and snuffing the lights. She wasn’t necessarily terrified, no heart racing or sweats. She wasn’t shaking, but she could feel the tension of anxieties starting to settle in. She got up only to open the window to the pouring rain outside. 

Yasha hadn’t been thinking of Molly, to her best attempts. The floodgates seemed to be open that night. She hadn’t known him long when he was completely lost. He was still trying to find something. Yasha had her memories, unlike her friend, but she was very curious about the tiefling building himself from absolutely nothing. At that point, Yasha had very little to live for, and despite his lack of experience, Yasha thought he could see the hopelessness in her.

She could not extract herself from her past the way he did, but he pushed her to be better constantly. He was fascinated by other people, and was able to make quick judgments. It took time, but he was able to sort out what he wanted from himself and it was to experience _everything_. Any town they stopped in, he would try on clothes, go to the bakeries, get as drunk as possible. He encouraged Yasha to come with him during these escapades.

She only saw a few of his breakdowns. He would cling to whoever was nearest to him. He wouldn’t cry, only soft pleas whether it be about being empty or trying to escape. He would gasp for air, certain he couldn’t breath. He would try to cough things out of his lungs that didn’t exist. Small things would help, repeating physical sensations. Her hands would follow his scars or tattoos, or her fingers would massage his scalp. When he’d come back to himself, he’d always try to make a joke of it, make light of it. No matter how they’d be situated, she would lean over to wherever there was exposed skin, and blow the worst raspberry she could. 

Yasha would often try to seclude herself whenever she knew she was becoming overwhelmed. It only took one or two times before Molly would catch on very quick. He would leave her alone for the most point, check up on her. He wouldn’t ask how she was doing, he already knew that answer. He’d give her updates on what everyone else was doing. “I’m heading with Boson to get a drink! I’ll bring you back something!” or “Gustav is making horrible puns again. I nearly retched at his most recent one.” Yasha had what Molly would call a ‘breaking point’. She would tug at her own hair, silent tears streaming down her cheeks, curled up in some corner. Similar to Molly, she would go nonverbal. At that point, Molly would sit next to her, not touching at all, softly telling random stories that he had heard on the street, until she would come back to herself.

When they were both well, they would have an assortment of activities and gifts given between each other. The best days, which was most of them, were when he’d insist on doing something unexpected. They were small victories over whoever had the body before him. Life was almost like a game. Yasha wasn’t ready to indulge yet, which was part of the reason she ached now. She was less convinced that she didn’t deserve it now.

At some point, Caduceus wandered into the room, laying on the other bed. Yasha stayed on her side faced away from him. At some point, Yasha would sleep, but she was a lot happier than she expected, thinking of her lost friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had a lot of fun writing this one. I've been having some big Yasha feelings lately. and I just...... love her so much. Thanks for reading!  
> Chapter title from "Let him Fly" by The Chicks


	3. Now there's never gonna' be an intermission, but there'll always be a closing night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Their mission to save Jester is momentarily postponed by their other tiefling friend.

They were able to save Molly. Frankly, it shouldn’t have been much of a surprise considering what they had accomplished with Obann or Vokodo. Shadycreek was nowhere near as perilous. However, like many of their missions, it was less of a bust in and kill everyone in the beginning. They needed to find him. 

Beau honestly didn’t think they were going to find him, and was only encouraging the diversion to Shadycreek because she thought they needed to do damage control about having a note about the Gentlemen go running around a competitor of his. They had split up, sending each other to search through the cleared out Jagentoth’s home and to the Mardoons to see if there was any news of the tiefling.

There hadn’t even been much evidence that Molly had been through there. They had searched through shelves of papers and files, with the help of Reani. It was strange to think a trafficking ring would have been so organized, but Beau should have known better that the best criminals would keep records. 

Caleb and Beau ended up on sorting duty. Not that she minded spending more time with the wizard. It made her softly laugh inside about the fact that Caleb used to brag to her about his reading speed when she was heading up to his skill level. They didn’t talk much then, but she appreciated his presence nonetheless. 

During this process she made note of repeating names, and found one of their people Gideon Fields to be a repeating element. His name was recent and occurring in a lot of their files. However, he was referred to as an old worker of theirs. Suddenly, his name stopped, and it didn’t reappear until they got to files from nearly a decade ago. She practically jumped up when she saw the name of someone they had tracked down. Clipped to the attached page of a contract to find him was a familiar flier. She shook Caleb so hard he got dizzy. She hugged him so hard, and it was nice because Caleb laughed. It was rare that the uptight ball of anxiety that Caleb was would release something. When she tried to pull away, Caleb didn’t let go, only whispering, “we’re going to find them.”

It had led back to The Fletching and Moondrop Traveling Carnival of Curiosities. Gustav was somewhere here, so they had Caduceus send him a message.

It took some persuading to have him meet up with their group. It didn’t lead them straight to Molly, but he was able to direct them to where the Jagentoths would have put him to work. It had been a relief to hear that Gustav didn’t sell the tiefling somewhere in the rotten city. 

They scoped out an odd dungeon area outside of the city, having Fjord and Caleb go inside, inconspicuous magic users that can disguise themselves. It also was nice to know that Fjord could heal now. Reani joined as a weasel in Fjord’s cape. They went in to see one of the shows the first night, not really sure what they were getting into.

It was supposed to be a fighting ring for incredibly violent prisoners that needed to be broken down further. It was supposed to be a good way for income, but the anger around the whole party was evident. They all had seen their fair share of inhumane things, this wouldn’t be the exception. Yasha and Fjord both could have easily been put in this place. They confirmed that they had seen Molly, both clearly unnerved without completely explaining why. Luckily, they ran into another old contact of theirs.

Beau had kept shutting down the idea of Keg, and in hindsight it was stupid and selfish. She was reasoning it with the fact that Keg said she was leaving Shadycreek, and she wouldn’t have been of use. Yet, she didn’t want Yasha to meet the second one night stand in the same two days. Beau wasn’t ashamed. She just really wanted a clean start with Yasha, and she didn’t want to have to reject either Keg or Reani. In the end, she didn’t have to. Both parties seemed to be very set on keeping their experiences a one time experience. It had just been sex for both of them, which was odd to see Reani and Keg’s identical stance due to their opposite personalities. It only slightly irked the monk on how she must give off the idea that she was meant to be temporary.

In the end, whatever descriptor Caleb and Fjord gave of the place didn’t compare to the sickness of watching unwilling people fight to the point of expiring while crowds of people shouted at them. They were in the seating of a badly lit stadium, with an announcer commentating about the states of the fighters as well as incoming fighters. Contestants would sometimes be called by nicknames or numbers. 

Ket had been the one escorting contestants to and from their cages. Beau and Caduceus were the first ones to notice the cage with the bright violet figure. The Nein had seen him more naked, but it wasn’t any comfort to know he’d be fighting that bare, as if he had decided to go dungeon delving in that god forsaken tapestry. 

Molly’s horrible title apparently had been the pitted plum. The announcer shouted the moniker and he was released. His opponent was a goliath, completely shaved. 

While everyone wanted to immediately go in, they looked at Yasha. Her familiar rage came onto her face as she whispered, “we should kill them all.” No one seemed to have any objections as Reani immediately created a giant storm on the audience. Beau jumped into the arena without any resistance as the rest of the group worked around the crowd. Keg ran to pull Molly out of the crowd towards the party. All Beau could hear from him was confused wails as he fought her grip. 

Beau would have loved to kill everyone there, but it was clear they wouldn’t be able to accomplish that. There was too much happening, but they all made their way into the arena. Beau could see the flying cat’s paw and different arcane energies flying as Fjord continued to yell “ELDRITCH BLAST” at various members of the crowd.

She helped Keg with Molly, letting Reani step up and cast something. He relaxed in their arms. Keg grabbed Molly’s face between her hands, harshly whispering something at him. All that Beau caught was, “I promised I wouldn’t leave you. Go with them, okay?”

They circled around him, letting Caleb cast the new teleport spell. The announcer attempted to Counterspell without any luck as Fjord countered it. 

That was the last thing as every member of their party minus Keg stood in the Xhorhouse. 

They did save Molly. It was just hard to believe that he was crouched on the floor of the study in their home. 

Caleb frowned. “I would have taken us to Nicodranas, but Jester-”

They all made murmurs in agreement as Molly scrambled away from all of them in a little bit more of a panic. Reani stepped forward, attempting to comfort him, healing some of his wounds. She turned back to the group. “I have him charmed for an hour, but I can drop it if you-”

“Not yet,” Beau reassured.

Yasha went to him while everyone tried to see any recognition in his eyes. When there wasn’t any, Caduceus grabbed some of the residuum from his pack. A warm glow that they were all familiar with by now emitted from his hand as it touched Molly’s forehead. Similar to when it was cast on Fjord on the deck of the Balleater, he had only a moment before he puked all over his own lap. It was the coughing that made Beau want to recoil and run to the bathroom. She fought the impulse and watched intently at his mouth. She had noticed something was wrong in the arena, and her fears were identified.

“His tongue was cut out,” she said, eyes wide.

Caduceus eyed him and nodded. “I can help with that tomorrow.”

Molly didn’t seem focused on anything they were saying as he continued to shake and gag on the floor. As soon as he stopped retching, Yasha carefully picked him up. “I’ll take him to a bed until then.” He fell asleep almost immediately in her arms, but the tension remained.

No one dared to argue it, only checking on them throughout the night. At some point, Yasha had joined him and he had himself wrapped around her. Beau couldn’t help but remember Molly describing being held by Yasha as a “swaddling hug.”

“ _ These arms are worth a lot.” _

Beau shook her head, eventually going to her room. She allowed herself to admit how much she missed everyone huddling up in the dome. Jester almost always would be curled up at her side with Caleb or Fjord on her other side. The terrifying comfort of her family and the hope of being able to see it whole again loomed over her, unable to understand why it knotted up in her stomach.

Caduceus must have cast his spell really early in the morning because it was already taken care of when she woke up. Molly was still attached to Yasha. Surprisingly, Caleb was the one to insist she take a break.

“I can switch her,” Beau volunteered.

“Ah. I think it would be better if I did it. I think if Yasha were to have a break she might want to spend it with you,” he explained, “and I also have magic that can help if something happens without harming him.”

Under different circumstances, Beau would have suggested Caduceus, but that wasn’t an option since Molly wouldn’t recognize him.

When Caleb left, Yasha emerged. It was clear to see her exhaustion from her posture, but it was a sigh of relief that escaped her mouth when she leaned against the door. Beau extended her hand, and she took it.

“Did he wake up at all?”

Yasha nodded. “I think he was having nightmares.” She swallowed thickly. “He recognized me, though.”

It was the last string of worry that clipped as Beau sat down with her. “That’s good.”

There wasn’t a lot of conversation that morning, but they eventually got up and got breakfast and went on a walk. It was nice to just spend some time with Yasha without the impending doom upon both of them. Her own desire to just ask her out and get it over with startled Beau a little bit. She wanted to genuinely be with her. Maybe even for a long time.  _ No, if Yasha wants anything, she’ll approach it. Don’t cause any more trouble for her _ .

Eventually, she insisted on switching Caleb back out, who was also wrapped up in lavender, which genuinely shocked both of them in the doorway. 

Caleb untangled himself with extreme lack of coordination, almost certainly waking Molly. 

“Yasha?” a soft groan from the tiefling where his head was flat in the pillow.

Yasha stepped in, taking Caleb’s place.

When Caleb walked out, she stared at him. “What the hell was that?”

Caleb only shrugged. “I’m not really sure.” He only let Veth get that close, even after all of this time.

The rest of the group gathered in the kitchen, sitting atop counters as Caduceus cooked lunch. “So we wait until Molly is alright enough to go to Vasselheim with us?” Veth said, kicking her feet against one of the cupboards.

Everyone released a breath. 

“The sooner we meet up, the better. We don’t need all of us to go there.” Fjord said.

Every eye turned to him, the idea seemed ludicrous, but he was right. 

“Shouldn’t someone stay behind with Yasha, just in case?” Beau said.

Fjord eyed her, giving a knowing smirk. All Beau could do is shake her head with a glare.

“It might be a good idea to call in a friend, we’re already short handed without Jester,” Beau further explained. She looked over the group again, shrugging. “Essek?”

Caleb winced. “I do not trust him.”

Beau practically scoffed. “We don’t have to trust him with all of our secrets. We’re not taking a risk about his goals, rather his care for us.”

“Also, they might just leave.” Veth pointed out.

“Yasha and Molly?” Fjord asked.

“Yasha’s not going to  _ just leave _ .” Beau hissed, leaning forward to sneer at Veth. “She’s not you and Caleb when we first met.”

Fjord snorted. 

Caleb’s eyes rolled. “That is… Fair. Perhaps we should just talk to Yasha? See what she would like to do. She’s been with Molly more she would know if he is able to travel or what he remembers-”

“You all can stop talking about me without me present, now.” The absolute bullshit accent made Beau freeze. Everyone turned to the doorway, Caduceus stopped cooking. “Hello, everyone.”

Beau lost view of everything else in the room. It was one of the few times that she had seen Molly look so uncomfortable. Whether his comfort was an act or not, he always seemed to relax in any situation. “ _ Your boy almost got himself killed tonight _ ,” Molly’s voice rang in her head. Today, he was crunched over himself, one of his hands up by his chest. He had a continual motion, running his nails in soft circles. He was so thin. New burns and scars tainted his skin. 

She wanted to just pull out his coat and give it to him. She wanted to run and crush him in a hug.  _ This wasn’t the time _ . She needed to wait. The patience she was forced to learn would get her through this conversation. She stood up straight, not willing to take her eyes off of him.

“I’m feeling great by the way.”

No one made a move except Caduceus who stepped through the kitchen to reach out his hand. Molly flinched for one moment before taking it. “Caduceus Clay.”

“Mollymauk Tealeaf.”

“You’re the friend with the Eyes of Nine.”

Alarms went off in Beau’s mind as Molly blanched, drawing back as if he had been burned. “I suppose.”

“I was very curious about that.”

“I don’t have anything to tell you.” Molly just looked at Yasha as if he had been beaten.

Both Beau and Yasha interrupted with small objections as Caduceus went on. “Still, it’s very interesting.”

The expression Molly held reminded Beau of herself. It was stoney, staring at the ground. “It’s not. If that’s the only reason you came to find me, then you’ve got nothing. I don’t owe anyone anything. I-” He started to shake, opening his mouth without any words coming out. 

Beau moved up, but was waved off by Yasha.

“I can’t be here,” he said, pushing past the barbarian.

As soon as a moment passed Beau turned to Caduceus. “That wasn’t your place to bring it up. This isn’t the time to process that.”

“I’ll talk to him, but there is a lot you do not understand about him. So please, give him a chance to calm down.” Yasha turned to walk out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so very sorry for this late chapter. I rewrote it 3 different times. I had so much I wanted to accomplish and then I ended up just giving up. I don't think I've ever had such a low motivation to write a piece of my story. Luckily, I have some of the next chapter written so I hope it won't be too long before I get it out. Once again, thank you for reading my writer upchuck.


	4. I scan the exits that embrace an easy out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Checking in with Molly as the most of the Nein head to Vasselheim.

Things were coming back in pieces. The first night was the worst with all of the shakes. He felt like his whole heart and soul were caving in. Honestly, he didn’t remember much of the Nein during their first encounter. When the big pink one introduced himself, Molly wasn’t sure if they had met before. 

There were people he did remember. Most of the carnival. Yasha. The twins. Gustav. The small one- Toya. There were a lot of emotions attached to it. Yet, they wouldn’t come back whole, and whenever something he remembered made him think of the fighting, he would lose himself. It was almost as if he was trying to find something to hold onto long enough so that he wouldn’t be carried away by the pain.

Yasha was nice. She’d run her fingers through his hair. He would try to track her movement. It had been a long time someone had done this for him. Someone who had touched his hair without trying to pull it out or force his gaze somewhere. There were moments where he didn’t fully remember her in the first few hours, unsure whether the arms around him would start to choke him or not. 

He was woken up when he was gagging. A familiar weight returned to his mouth as he kept tripping over his own sounds. It wasn’t like he hadn’t learned how to speak this lifetime around. Learning to talk was the thing that got his tongue cut out in the first place. The dwarf woman was the only person who really tried to communicate with him. He didn’t open his eyes, only burying himself in the warmth. The very familiar smell after the barbarian had put up all the tents on the first night. “ _ Yasha _ .” It was a croaked whisper. Water was probably a good idea, but he wasn’t about to move for anything. 

The second time he fully woke up, someone, probably Yasha, was at the desk, working on something. “ _ Yasha. _ ” He reached out, landing on her leg. He felt himself getting colder by the second, shivers overcoming him. 

There were no words as a hand grabbed his own, squeezing it lightly. He felt something welling up inside of him as he tried to reach her.  _ “Please _ -” he tried to say more but it came out as shallow gasps, tugging at the arm.

She was saying something. Asking him something. He couldn’t tell if it was actually Yasha.  _ It had to be her. She wouldn’t just leave you like this. You’re freezing to death. _ There was a hand on his shoulder, and he couldn’t see much but something distinctly purple against his skin . The hand moved to the back of his neck as he felt a small pressure of someone kissing his forehead. 

He pulled the figure forward, landing on top of him. He let out more pleas, not going further than a few words as she wrapped her arms around him.

“Ja, I can do this,” a faint whisper in his ear. 

It was okay because he was  _ warm _ .

Fourth time's the charm, Yasha wrapped around him again, humming a soft tune, resembling one of Toya’s songs. Yasha. The Charm. The first person he got to know when he was functional. He  _ missed  _ her. He didn’t know that he missed her, but having the hairy pale arms around him made him ache at how much he wanted her with him.

“Yasha,” he whispered, a dry ache in his throat. He must just be dehydrated. He snuggled into her chest a little further, but eventually he had to open his eyes. When he did, he saw color. There was some sort of field, it was hard to tell before his eyes focused. It wasn’t anything natural, much to his surprise, but a wall beautifully painted. Yasha’s snores came to a quick end as she sat up with him.

“ _ Molly _ -” All the sudden, she tackled him into the bed, holding him close. “Is that you?”

He chuckled, suddenly feeling every injury on his skin reopen, but it didn’t matter. All he could manage is relax in the grasp of his captor. “It’s me.”

She buried her face into his neck, grinning against him. “My friend.” he could hear her holding back tears with the wavering in her voice. “I’m happy to hear your voice.”

“And yours.” 

“We have to go see the others, as soon as your ready.”

Gustav, Orna, Bo-  _ No _ . He corrected himself. The other colorful group he joined. The circus had been shut down. That made him sit up, groaning with every ache in his body settling in. “Where are we?”

Yasha smirked. “Our home in Xhoras.” 

Head tilted. “Your home?”

She shook her head. “No. The Mighty Nein’s.”

_ The Mighty Nein _ . Like something on his todo list that he just remembered. A group of misfits. There weren’t nine of them. It was seven. Seven members of the Mighty Nein. He snorted at the thought of their running practical joke. 

“In Xhorhas?” He wasn’t that familiar with geography, but he was pretty sure the empire wasn’t too fond of their neighbor country. 

She nodded. “Yes.”

“Did you just start looking for real estate here?”

“It was given to us from the queen.”

He felt more confused than he had moments ago. “Why?”

“Well… Veth’s husband was kidnapped by the Dynasty. We came over and we gave them that glowing artifact.”

“Oh yeah. That drow was smuggling that thing.” It felt weird to recall that when he couldn’t even picture the faces of his fellow party members. He frowned. “How long has it been?”

“Seven months? I’m not sure exactly. Much longer than I would have liked.”

Something was swelling inside of him. It was overwhelming. If it had been that long, how well does he know the people outside waiting for him. He buried himself back against Yasha. He opened his mouth to say something to lighten the mood, but he found his tongue to be too large for his mouth all of the sudden. 

Yasha just laughed. “We all made it out of Shadycreek because of you.”

That was what did it. Lorenzo. He remembered falling to the ground, the last moments before it was darkness. He remembered the feeling of being impaled, his whole body convulsing. He was twitching in her arms, unsure of how to stop himself. 

She didn’t hold him tighter, only slightly tensing until his body calmed down. She kissed his temple, probably aware of the tears streaming down his face.  _ How embarrassing _ .

After a long sigh. “Should we go see the others?”

  
  


He heard them talking in the kitchen, but he was far more fascinated by their home. They passed a bedroom going down the hall from Yasha’s. She opened the door to reveal a barely decorated room in pale blues. “This could be your room. We’d obviously change anything you’d want.”

“Wow.”

She pointed out Beau and Jester’s room as well as Fjord’s while going past without opening their doors. She showed him down the spiral staircase.She went down and pointed out a staircase that led to their  _ hot tub _ . They walked through the dining room, now hearing their conversation loud and clear. Their planning however was extremely convoluted as always.

He watched for a moment, trying to get a grasp on the different members. 

The half-orc had his arms crossed was the first one to catch his eye. Fjord. Really thick drawl. He had enjoyed talking with Fjord, and he often felt on the same page with him. Fjord was his roommate. He was very curious and it made Molly very weary of him in the beginning, asking all of the right questions, but still seeming unsure of himself.

Sitting on the counter next to him was the underdressed monk. Different from Fjord, she asked all of the wrong questions and still managed to seem too sure of herself. She held herself on a pedestal, and it severely annoyed Molly because it wasn’t genuine which made her a smartass. Today, Molly felt irritated because her outfit was actually pretty spot on. 

The next few were hard to identify. Another person sitting on the counter… A halfling? He clenched his jaw at the fact he couldn’t remember her. Was he always going to have these gaps? 

The tall figure was faced away, but it was easy to spot the bright pink hair. He felt his heart hammering at the fact that he didn’t recall it.

The last face belonged to the man speaking. He leaned against the door frame, slightly conclave posture. His thick accent was what hit him first. However, the clean bright red hair was a little bit of a shock because it didn’t match the image of the scowling face he was remembering. Dirty hair that might have been red at some point but was so greasy and ruined. He had someone at his side constantly. They were a pair. Someone odd. He remembered far more about his partner. Small. Green.  _ Goblin _ . She drank a lot and was stealing things.

The conversation went by way too quickly. He interrupted and everyone stared at him with hesitation in all of their eyes. A thousand words unsaid between the group.

The pink one introduced themself and immediately commented on the eyes. He felt like he was a fish plucked out of the water, nothing left to do but flap and panic.

He wasn’t even sure of what he was saying, only attempting to save his composure. It was shattered as it was put underpressure. He fled from the group, feeling the heat in his blood. He was furious, recalling their conversation about Lucien. He still never wanted to face any of that, and the Nein  _ knew  _ that.  _ They just didn’t care _ . They didn’t care how that made him feel like a caged animal.

A sick feeling started to grow in his throat as he fought back vomit. He was now all too familiar with being a caged animal. He remembered the dwarf woman looking after him through the bars.  _ Keg _ . He had a name for her now. She always ensured he had food to eat and sometimes snuck him healing potions when she was able to.

It was extremely frustrating when he got to the main hall and not knowing how to get out of the building. His desire to flee continued to grow until Yasha came in, leading him through an entryway and out the front door. 

He could barely speak, his voice crumbling. “Is that really only the reason you came to get me?” He wouldn’t care. He refused to care about why they came to get him. He was free now, so he could just fuck them. Leave them in the dirt if they didn’t want him exactly as is.

“Of course not.”

“I can’t be with them,” he growled, pacing on the porch. “They’re horrible fucking-”

“You’re going to stop fucking talking,” she said in a firm tone she only took on rare occasions when dealing with jack asses. 

He shut his mouth instantly.

“Molly, you know I love you. We haven’t been dealing with your past, and we can get into this another day.”

“Yash-”

“No, Molly. If you leave right now, I will not go with you.”

Something must have been ripping for it was all he could hear in that moment. His eyes widened as he stepped away from her. Yasha was one who constantly wandered and he expected this from her, but he didn’t expect her to choose this group of odd balls over him. He took the moment to actually look her over. She was much stronger than she used to be, blue woven into her hair which was growing brighter. The real difference was in how she held herself. Similar to the change in the wizard’s posture, she was unmissable in the sense of strength rather than size. 

He really wished he had gotten to see her progress. He didn’t love Yasha because she was broken, but it did feel like a slap in the face to see someone resolute and accepting of herself. He had to get to know Yasha in the present. The healthiest version of his friend he has encountered. It was an incredible pride running through him.  _ She deserves to have a family that she doesn’t need to choose between _ .

He only opened his arms and she picked him up from underneath his armpits. “Give them a chance. They are assholes.”

He smirked. “I won’t condemn them for being assholes. That would make me an extreme hypocrite, yeah?”

“Yes it would.”

He went limp in her arms, letting his legs dangle a bit as he sill hugged her. 

“Just try until we get Jester back.”

_ “Do you know my name?” _ he could hear the inquisitive tone. The incredibly bubbly accent and demeanor. She had been another tiefling. He enjoyed her presence, even if she had been abrupt in her mannerisms. 

Yasha set him down carefully.

“What happened to Jester?” 

“She was kidnapped with her fake god when they impersonated a real god.”

He snorted. Getting these stories without any context was getting more concerning, but it did make him incredibly curious.

“Perhaps we can tell you the story inside,” she muttered, offering her arm.

He took it, letting her lead him inside.

The halfling had come into the main area. He didn’t get a good look at her before, but she had a very cute yellow dress and beautiful makeup across her face and ears. “Mollymauk, we got you some clothes that you can use until you can go shopping for your own.”

“I didn’t catch your name.”

She seemed surprised for a moment before smiling lightly, and Molly could only hope that he hadn’t known her before. “You wouldn’t recognize me I guess. We’ve met before, but I wasn’t myself then.” She reached out her hand. “I’m Veth Brenatto, formerly known as Nott the Brave.”

_ Nott _ . He had recalled the goblin a little bit, but the name seemed to help get his memory going. She was as defiant as Jester. Something about being a detective. He had charmed her once, and didn’t seem to understand why he wouldn’t associate with his past. Despite their disagreements, he knew she was powerful, and how much she cared for the wizard. It was just worrisome about where her loyalties were.

“Ah, it is nice to meet you… Again?” He shook her hand, probably a bit hasitly. 

She nodded. “We put your clothes in the spare room.”

She went upstairs with Yasha and Molly, following a bit behind. She mentioned being eager to see if Molly liked the additions to his wardrobe. He didn’t seem to mind them, a maroon shirt with dark black pants. A periwinkle coat with a high collar and black beads creating a floral design. It wasn’t as long as his old coat, but he let out an appreciative purr when running his hands along the textured front. “This is very nice of you.” High knee brown boots didn’t surprise him at all, with two rapiers and metal arm bracers.

“Yasha bought the bracers a while back. They’ll help keep you from getting hit until you can get some armor.” Veth kind of rambled, kicking the floor with her foot. 

Honestly, Molly had a very low opinion of Nott. She continued to steal from the party without remorse, and kept her wizard on a pedestal that seemed to do more harm than good. Their lack of trust was infuriating. However, when she had good moments, it was always jarring. Similar to this moment.

She hugged around his legs really quick before running off. 

“That was incredibly sweet,” Molly observed.

Yasha nodded. “She’s nice when she wants to be. She must be really worried about you, especially since she doesn’t like you much.”

“No?”

Yasha didn’t explain, only shaking her head for a bit. “Get dressed, we’ll be heading out soon.”

He met them all downstairs. 

He tried to watch a little closer. Veth was sneaking some extra food into her pockets with Beau. A circle was being drawn on the ground. Yasha was talking with Caduceus, nodding along with whatever he had to say. Fjord looked as though he was trying to pay attention, though it was clear to see his focus be turned elsewhere.

“I’m glad the clothes fit,” Beau said.

“Yes. They look good too, so I’m going to assume you didn’t have a hand in choosing it.”

Fjord let out a loud snort. 

Her eyes rolled, without the loathing he was used to. “I wanted to talk about you coming anyways. I don’t think it’s a good idea he comes along.”

“That’s probably fair,” Caduceus spoke up slowly.

He was ready to defend himself, but Beau waved her hand up to stop him. “As much as you hate it, you’re recovering from literal abuse to your body and your mind. I’d want you there as much as the next guy, but the- who were they again?”

“The Trickfoots,” Veth supplied.

“Yeah, those guys, it’s just supposed to be talking. We won’t need your skillset anyways. It’s best to be safe about this.”

The name shot through him, no memories. But a distinct uncomfort settled into his stomach in an unexpected way. As if it were a craving for a meal he hadn’t had for a while, or like thinking of Yasha when she had left for a few weeks. It was soured in his own fear. By instinct to any past information, he nodded. “Oddly enough, I think I agree with you. I’m feeling a bit under the weather and I’d hate to find myself in a grave again sometime soon due to not taking care.”

Something he was noticing really quick was the look Caduceus gave him whenever he said anything. He knew that he drew attention, but he didn’t like the idea of being studied by the firbolg.

“I don’t think my skills are needed for this either,” Yasha said, reaching back to clutch the blade behind her to make a point.

“I don’t need to be supervised, I'm not a child.” He didn’t like being treated incapable, but he really didn’t like the idea of being alone.  _ How hard could it be _ ?

“Yash, Vasselheim has a whole section of their city for the Stormlord. It might do you some good to learn more about him. Of course you can stay behind, but I was actually thinking that maybe that I would.” Beau said. “Going through the Soul without me won’t be great, but as long as you notify them, I think they’ll be fine with you passing through really quick.”

There were a few odd looks, and normally Molly might think that Beau was planning to kill him, but he everyone seemed to relax at her honesty.

“What do you say? We’ll go to a bathhouse and get you acquainted with Xhorhas.” 

“Alright, count me in.”

“We shouldn’t leave you two alone,” Caduceus shot in.

“Call in Essek to check on us, but I think you’ll be in more danger than us.”

It was easy to tell that Fjord wasn’t thrilled at this idea, but eventually they all came to an agreement. 

The rest of the Nein vanished into a teleportation circle. Molly wasn’t sure what he expected, but it almost looked like they evaporated. He glanced at Beau who seemed slightly perplexed as well.

“Was that how it’s supposed to look?”

“Yeah, but the only time I had seen it from the otherside before was watching Frumpkin disappear into nothing.”

Molly snorted, making his way to the dining room. “Well, what bone do you have to pick with me then?”

“Who says I have a bone to pick with you?”

“You stayed back while the rest of the group went on an important mission to be with me. No offense,” he paused. “Actually, I don’t care if you take offense, but I never thought we were in a relationship of caring for eachother whenever the other was sick. Perhaps I’m remembering wrong.”

“No, we definitely weren’t.”

“So, what’s the reason, then?”

He turned around just in time to catch her rolling her eyes while grabbing one of the stale biscuits from the counter. “You’re ridiculous, but correct. It’s a conversation I doubt you want to have.”

“That would be a point for any conversation we have, dear.”

“Keep pressing, Tealeaf. It’s not going to make this any better,” she said, shoving half of the biscuit into her mouth. Surprisingly enough, she chewed and swallowed before continuing, and even more shocking, he allowed her to without interrupting. “I was right next to you when you died.”

He had died. He knew he had crawled himself out of the ground, but the admission of his own demise made him run a hand over his chest. “Right.”

“Caleb and Nott were there, but I was barely a few feet away from you. You goaded Lorenzo and then was knocked unconscious before he even hit you.”

Molly wasn’t sure he was grateful he didn’t remember at this exact moment. Anytime he remembered anything he would lose all perspective of the current situation, and he wasn’t about to show Beau how much he was struggling with it. However, he didn’t have a damn idea on what she was saying.

“You saved me. One of us was going to die, and you made sure it was you.” She took a deep breath. “As much as I want to go into how stupid of a sacrifice it was, I’m grateful, but I swear to god if you ever do something so self destructive again, I’ll beat you as soon as you turn into a fucking ghost.”

“So you’re saying next time I have the chance to help you don’t do it.”

“Next time you need to help me at the expense of your own life, worry about yourself first. We’ve grown a lot, and it was something that always bothered me. It wasn’t even Lorenzo that had knocked you down, it was  _ you _ . You used your stupid blood magic to harm yourself.”

Molly rubbed between his eyes. “If it makes you feel any better, it wasn’t the desire to die in that moment, I don’t think.” It wasn’t an exact memory, but the sensation of being bone tired. He kept running his mouth, despite not being sure what would come out next. “If I could blind him, I would be safer. It was a dumb move and I pushed my limits.”

Her hands dropped to her side. “Oh my  _ god _ . It was just you being a fucking dumbass.” Her hands covered her face as she turned around, abandoning what was left of her snack. “ _ Fuck _ .”

“Didn’t realize you’d think about it this much, honestly.”

“I don’t think you know me as well as you think you do. Also, you don’t know what kind of impacts you're going to have when you’re gone.” 

He opened his mouth ready to object.

“I get that you have your whole ‘leave each place better than you found it.’ Which is a great ideal, and I’m doing my best to follow in the footprints you left, okay? But, when you left we weren’t better off. We found Caduceus, which was good. You being alive and here was important, but you left a Molly shaped hole in our family.”

“Yes, but don’t you think you were better having known me?”

She whipped around so fast. “Stop bullshitting me. Of course we were. All of us. Me especially. Yet, your death was close to countering all that good you had done for us. All I’m saying is you should be more careful with yourself.”

“Never knew you cared so much.” He was trying to hold onto the bickering. Mostly because he had ran out of insightful things to say for once in his life. 

“Yeah, well there’s a lot of things you left behind you didn’t know.”

There was a long pause. “I’ll be more careful. Believe it or not, I prefer being alive than dead, I think. Plus, I would hate to have to dig my way out again. Getting myself out of whatever you had wrapped me in was the real puzzle.”

“The Platinum Dragon tapestry,” Beau attempted to hide her shit eating grin, unsuccessfully. 

“That damn thing nearly killed me a second time. Third time? Horrifyingly accurate warning to be careful with what you purchase or your friends will bury you in it,” he observed out loud.

“It was a way of respecting your body, dickhead.”

He waved his hand, ignoring the comment while walking out of the room. “Are you going to give me the rest of this tour then?”

She groaned, but there wasn’t any real malice in it. 

Oddly enough, Molly quite enjoyed his time with Beau. They bickered, but she seemed to have less of the need to be the smartest person in the room. She still reminded him distinctly of the twins. He hadn’t seen them since the investigation of the carnival. She was excited to show their small hot tub underneath their house, explaining that it used to be a wine cellar.

They went to different shops around Rosohna, and the darkness was a bit jarring. It was nice going to the bathhouse. 

He had noticed her new tattoo across her back. The shiny green across her back would have been hard to miss, and his heart ached slightly for a reason he couldn’t quite identify. Since he wasn’t sure of how he was reacting, he didn’t comment on it, silently admiring it as they bathed.

He hadn’t realized how crusty his skin had gotten. They had bought out one of the fancier packages to get a full spa treatment. He even was able to guilt Beau into washing out his hair.

She ran her hands through, most of it getting caught on extreme knots. “Uh, Molly?”

“Hm?”

“Your hair is turning pink at the roots.”

He sat up, water splashing around him. “What?” He wasn’t sure what he expected to see without any mirror. 

“Yeah, like a good inch or two is bright pink like Caduceus’.” 

“Odd.”

As soon as they were able to get a mirror, he stared at it for a while. Unfortunately they didn’t spend the time getting his haircut. He desperately wanted to get rid of the horrible ruined curls and to reveal more of the fresh color. He considered cutting it out himself when he got back to the house, but a handsome drow waiting for them was enough to distract him.

Unfortunately, said drow was a prick. 

He seemed to be genuine for a moment before realizing it was just Beau and Molly. You could practically see his walls go up as Molly introduced himself. He was quick to belittle him when Molly asked about his work. 

When he finally left, Molly turned to Beau. “What. A. Dick.”

Beau snorted. “Odd coming from you.”

He rolled his eyes, unable to come up with anything clever enough worth saying. 

“Nah, Essek will warm up to you. He is a dick, but so are the rest of us. Plus, we’re all pretty sure he has a thing for Caleb.”

_ Caleb _ . The name to the face. He vividly remembered pinning the cowering man up to the wall. The fear and shame in the man’s eyes were always present. 

“Caleb! That’s his name.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“I’m having a hard time recalling everything, if I’m being honest. I was trying to remember that red head’s name all day.”

Beau stared at him for a long while, trying to detect something that Molly couldn’t be sure of. Eventually, she just laughed. “Whatever man, we’re all here to help you remember. Next time just ask.”

It wasn’t long after that when the Nein returned through the front door. Yasha and Fjord both display new bruises and cuts. 

“You missed out on the fighting ring,” Fjord said to Beau when he walked in.

“Aw man,” Beau responded. 

The mention of the ring made Molly’s stomach drop, but he quickly ignored it with the others entering.

“We are heading to the Feywild, so get your things ready,” Caduceus said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title from "Runaway" by half.alive


	5. Too much thinking can start me sinking down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Having a chat with Artagan and maybe retrieving their other missing member.

It was wet and cold, similar to being caught in a storm in the middle of the ocean. However, they stood on even ground when they were first teleported. There wasn’t even any mud forming at the base of their feet. It wasn’t dark, though. They couldn’t see through the thick trees above them, but small lights flickered and floated around them like one of Caleb’s spells. Saying Fjord was distracted was an understatement, he felt himself walking towards them, reaching out before he could even process what he was doing.

Caduceus grabbed his arm and pulled him back. “Stay on task.”

“Right.”

It wasn’t hard for them to call upon Artagan, who arrived in far more extravagant robes than what they had seen previous. 

Beau was ready as soon as he appeared, twisting around as fast as she could. Yet, she was still snared in vines, holding her completely taught. 

“Goddammit! You fucking deserve it! Let me get one good hit in!”

Fjord sighed. “Go easy on him, Beau.”

The sting as if she had been stabbed in the back was obvious on her expression. She stared at him for a solid moment. Fjord had encouraged her to try and punch him multiple times by now, but the reality that Artagan tried to kick Jester off of him made Fjord take pity. Artagan must’ve counted her as distracted when the vines retracted. He miscalculated as there was a loud crack as she hit him across the jaw.

He fell backwards, and luckily Beau didn’t go for another punch. She shook her fist a little, glaring at both Fjord and Artagan now. 

“Alright, we know about the doorway that was created before. The Trickfoots said that you had some sort of key,” Fjord said. The Trickfoots were not what he was expecting. Taryon had said that Pike was extremely terrifying and a respectable opponent and Fjord knew he shouldn’t have underestimated her despite her gnomish form and light demeanor. 

Artagan let out a light hum with a grin while stroking his chin. “Yes, I have a key, but it won’t do any good from this side, apparently. I’d call it a miscalculation on our part.”

“If we take it back to the material plane, and we open it from the other side, do you think you and Jester could make it through without releasing anything awful into our plane?” Beau sneered.

Fjord did his best to wave her off, but it resulted in her tensing up even more.

“That would be the best course of action, but I think you should try and take her from here on your way out.”

Fjord straightened up. _They might be able to take her back today_. It was a sickening excitement and delight that started to swell. “Really?”  
“Of course. I would hope you’d at least try.”

“We’ll do our best. We don’t know what chains the Moonweaver still has around her,” Caduceus pointed out.

Molly’s head popped up at that. “The Moonweaver?” 

Fjord had long forgotten that Molly was a worshipper of the Moonweaver. He had been dodgy about the subject, but Molly had been dodgy about every subject laid out in front of him.

“All I’m asking for is an attempt. I want her with me, but I worry for her safety.”

“Then we’re in agreement that everyone wants what’s best for her.” Fjord had been suspicious of Artagan on more than one occasion, and he still wouldn’t call him a moral being, but as long as he was working as hard as the Nein to keep Jester alive and well, it didn’t really matter. Fjord sure as hell couldn’t say the same about the relationship between Fjord’s safety and his previous patron.

“Where is the doorway on the Material plane?”

“The far northwestern edge of Wildmount. The Stonecage cliffs. Shouldn’t be too hard to get there. They wanted it to be in a completely desolate place so that nothing would bother it. Of course, it’s invisible to the naked eye, but you have ways around that, no?”

Caduceus and Beau both nodded in unison. 

“I think we can manage that.” Fjord said. 

Artagan outstretched his hand. Fjord shook it, and as soon as he took his gaze away, the whole group was in a different place. Similar glowing trees surrounded them, but a creek and a clearing were ahead of them now.

“She’s up there.” He waved a hand, and a tall tower appeared.

“Can’t you just transport us inside?” Beau’s disgruntled voice.

Artagan cocked his head. “Unexpected? That would be just rude.”

Everyone walked up to the stone tower, Beau grumbling about it being some fucked up fairytale, and Fjord couldn’t agree more. By time they reached the door, Artagan had vanished.

A slow knock on the door, and they could hear footsteps thundering downstairs. The door swung open and revealed a tussled Jester Lavorre. Her hair was messily tied into a bun, her pale blue dress now ripped up the side with it caked in mud. Fjord looked for any injuries and luckily found none.

Her breath hitched. “You guys.”

“Sorry it took so long, Jessie,” Veth said, pushing past them to hug around her side.

“We’re gonna take you back.” Caduceus said.

“It’s so good to see you!” She knelt down to hug Veth back. Everyone pretty much gathered around, hugging tightly. 

Fjord saw Molly out of the corner of his eye and pushed away. “We had to take a detour before heading your way,” he said, clearing his throat.

Everyone took the signal and took a step back, revealing the tieflings to each other.

If seeing the Nein was surprise, seeing Molly was pure disbelief. Her hand covered her mouth as if to hold back any reaction. “ _ Molly _ ?”

Molly seemed to be surprised in his own right, though Fjord couldn’t imagine exactly why.

Jester looked at each of her friends, ensuring none of them were disguised as him. “ _ Is that really you _ ?” Her voice was completely absent as she let out a squeaked whisper. 

He nodded, and she jumped across the gap between them, arms around his torso. He was knocked backwards a few steps at the momentum. 

Molly held her extremely tightly, everyone could see him trying to hold on like a dying man, hand going to the back of her head.

She was whispering something as she buried her face into his shoulder, Molly chuckled in response. No one intervened, only watching as Jester trembled in his arms. Eventually, she pried herself off of him, smiling with tears shining on her cheeks. 

She glanced around at everyone else. “Is this real?”

“Ja, it is,” Caleb said, finding his voice for the first time since being in the Feywild.

“Well, we can’t head back tonight,” Caduceus said. “I can only Plane Shift once per day.”

Caleb spoke up again. “I have something I’d like to show you in the meantime.” He turned to Jester. “May we come in?”

She clapped her hands together. “Of course!”

She led them up the stairs, revealing a fairly nice studio suite, lavish curtains surrounding a four post bed. 

“Jes, have you left this place at all?” 

She faltered only for a second before smiling. “Yeah! Artie has shown me some amazing things. Although, if he’s not around he’s had me stay in here because it's almost like the world is turned upside down and very dangerous.” She clapped her hands, changing the subject. “What do you have to show us,  _ Cayleb _ ?”

Caleb grinned, pulling out a wand. Fjord didn’t pay too close attention to the next bit because he couldn’t remember the last time he used a wand. When Fjord first wanted to become a magic user, he thought that wizards  _ always _ used wands. The doorway standing before all of them was enough to pull him out of the thought.

“Welcome home,” he opened the door to wave them all in.

It was a beautiful entryway with stained glass windows all around them. Caleb walked to the center of the room and said, “all you need is to think ‘up’”

With that, Caleb levitated into the air, landing onto whatever the second floor brought to them. 

Every time Caleb introduced them to one of his spells Fjord was always breathless and a little jealous, if he were honest. This amazement already boiled to the top, and he knew they hadn’t seen  _ anything  _ yet.

“ _ Holy shit _ ,’ he heard Molly from behind him.

It was hard to even comprehend the surprise of Caleb’s abilities from Molly’s perspective.

Fjord followed Caleb up, revealing nine more walls, all with sliding doors. When everyone else joined them, “this floor is here for whatever you all need at any given moment. There is a hot tub, target practice, even available amenities for parties and such-” Caleb began rambling, hands waving in front of him in an excited motion. It was always refreshing to see the wizard grinning like a gleeful child. The more he understood about Caleb’s past, the more Fjord valued his friend’s passion and love.

He waved them to the third floor, and Fjord had trouble listening as all of the color and designs revealed themselves. Three floors of books, if that wasn’t true to Caleb’s character, there was beautifully crafted upholstery that would stand well against the Pillow Trove or even the Lavish Chateau, with a roaring brick fireplace, above it more stained glass with the design of Molly’s coat. His mouth fell open at the detail, as if they had seen it every single day during the previous year. He had to look back and check that Molly was even still with them like he could disappear at any moment.  _ It had been so easy. There must be something more to that _ .

In the moment, Caleb glanced at Molly for approval, who had wide eyes and a full grin. He stepped forward, staring only at that. “What- What is this?”

“I had designed this part long before we got you back. It was a way of remembering our roots, I suppose,” Caleb explained. “I can change it if you-”

“No need. This is very kind, Mister Caleb.”

“Plus he likes the attention,” Beau basically shouted from the back.

He didn’t dwell as they went further up, as they did so, Fjord caught a glimpse of the cats running into small holes in the wall. 

The fourth floor had necessities, a dining room and kitchens. Equally impressive, but Fjord could feel his whole face begin to stuff up with the sight of the cats. Despite knowing they weren’t even real, the reaction to them clogged his nose anyways. The others laughed at his dramatic sneezing, and while he pretended to be deeply offended, he found his own amusement in it.

The fifth floor had three bedrooms. Caduceus, Yasha and Molly. “I apologize Molly, I didn’t have as much time to design yours.” 

All of them, however, were equally amazing. Yasha’s with floral decor and Stormlord symbology. Caduceus’ had references to the Wildmother and the origins of his grove. Molly’s was basically thrown up with color and organization resembling the carnival they had all been to. There was likely more detail that Fjord could barely even take in, eager now to see his own room.

They all drifted up into the next floor where Jester’s, Beau’s and Fjord’s rooms were. Fjord couldn’t help but go straight into his which was marked with the anchor. It was filled with sea imagery, and instinctively he took a deep breath even smelling the salty brine of the ocean. The reminders to his experiences were all breathtaking and unmistakable. 

When the others moved to their rooms, he followed out of curiosity. Beau’s was filled with less ornaments, but there was semblance of the Cobalt Soul, and even the hilarious implications of a mirror above her mattress. 

Jester’s was extremely cute, reminiscent of Nicodranas. It was mostly pink furniture with a four post bed and cute unicorns embroidered into her comforter. Jester immediately went to jump on her bed in comparison to Beau’s hesitancy. “Wow, Cayleb! This is really comfy!”

Everyone had been singing praises to their wizard and it was much deserved, but Fjord found himself speechless with every room. The last floor Fjord was already spaced out in Veth’s room and laboratory.

They all ended up in the dining room while cats made whatever they could think of. Molly continued to order more alcohol, and seemed ready to indulge in everything. “We need to go see Caleb’s hot tub!” Jester said as everyone decided to head to bed.

“I’m heading to bed,” Beau said, Caleb, Yasha and Caduceus following with her. 

“I’m down for a hot tub dip,” Molly nodded.

“I’ll come, too.” Fjord. He had been extremely quiet over the course of the night, wanting to make these moments last just a little bit longer 

Veth seemed to debate for a moment before following Caleb to the top.

“Us three, then? Delightful,” Molly ran to the center and went below, Jester jumping after him.

Well, it was the first night with both chaotic tieflings back, better take advantage of it. They had already stripped and dipped by time he reached them. Naked in a waterhole. 

“Come on, Fjord!” Jester called, waving him over.

“Molly! We have so much to show you now, though!” Jester squealed while Fjord undressed. “Like oh my goodness, you have to meet my Mama and OH!” The water splashed as she splashed in it. “We found my dad!”

“Ah yes, that was something you were searching for. Is he what you expected?”

“He is  _ totally _ different from what I expected, but you were right! You helped me with your cards! Your cards! I have them!” She shook her head, attempting to get back on track. “But my dad! You’ve already met him.” Her excitement had been low throughout dinner, and it was nice to hear it. He couldn’t help but watch her create an air of comfort around her. She always did that with everyone she met.  _ Disarmingly charming _ . The Nein couldn’t afford to lose her again. Fjord couldn’t afford to lose her again.

“Have I now?” Molly must have summoned a cat to get him a glass of wine because it arrived in the tail of a grey poofy cat. 

“ _ The Gentleman _ .”

His eyes narrowed. “The crime boss?”

“Yes! He’s my dad and we’re totally going to play uno!”

Molly laughed with no attempt in covering it. “You have very powerful parents, dear. Makes a lot of sense.”

Jester pulled her arms around her, the smile very still on her face. “Yeah. It’s whatever.”

Fjord finally got in after folding all of his clothing in the corner. 

“What about you, Mister Sword Swallower? Anything remarkable to note in your news?”

He forced a laugh out because where to begin? From everything on the ocean to the development with the Wildmother. “Ah, well, we did some digging into the patron that gave me these powers and there is a lot going on in the ocean with this awful sea god.”

“Hold on. Didn’t you used to have a really low drawl?” 

“Ah, yes. That was something I picked up from someone I admired in my youth. It was more of an attempt to be something I wasn’t, and eventually it didn’t seem worth it anymore.”  _ How many people would he have to explain that to _ ?

“Happier in your own skin, then?”

Fjord nodded. “Trying to be, at least. I also find myself asking for support from the divine.”

“Ah, any specific worship?”

“The Wildmother.”

Molly smiled. “It suits you well. Your confidence seems much more assured.”

“It is.”

He turned his attention back to Jester. “I heard this was a result of a tangle with the Moonweaver?”

“Oh yeah,” she scrunched up her nose. “We were trying to push all of Artagan’s followers onto  _ her _ . It was supposed to be a win-win situation, but she didn’t like him pretending to be her.”

“You worshipped her, right?”

“Still do.” He took a long sip, staring straight at Fjord.

“We didn’t mean to offend,” Jester said.

“I have no doubt in your intentions, Jester, and I’m sure she doesn’t either,” he reassured, but Jester only pouted.

“Would you help me with something?” Molly asked. “I’m in desperate need of a haircut.”

“Oh! Let me go get scissors!” She ran out of the room, Fjord narrowly looking at his lap through the water. 

“You could just-” Molly’s voice trailed off a bit “-have a cat get it.” There was a long silence, but Molly didn’t look anywhere except Fjord’s blushing face. 

“Are you going to quit looking at me like that?”

“Are you going to quit looking at Jester like she’s god?” Molly quickly shot back.

Fjord shot up at that. “I just missed her. Goodness, you’re worse than Caduceus.”

A snort. “I highly doubt that. It took less than five seconds for that man to unnerve the hell out of me, and things tend to not get under my skin so easily. But Jester. Are you two-”

“No. We’re not anything and we- I don’t know. I don’t really care what we are if I’m by her side, but for a minute I thought all we had was time. We had time to figure it out, but she was taken by a literal god, and your presence again is just a reminder of the lack of permanence of things.” 

“Well, I think if you want something, you should be direct. Take a chance.”

His eyes rolled. “It’s easy to say that.” Frankly, it was already in his plan to act on his feelings, but it was almost like a gross sense of spite telling him not to.

Molly shrugged. 

When Jester returned, she cut his hair, revealing the bright pink. Jester gushed about it being her favorite color, running her fingers through it. “Do you think it’ll grow more like this?”

“Honestly, I have no idea.”

The hair was left around the hot tub, as Molly got up. “I think we all should head to bed otherwise we won’t be up until noon tomorrow.”

“Smart man.”

They all began to dress and separate to their rooms. Jester waved as she went into her room, hesitating only for a moment. Fjord spent a solid minute outside of their rooms pacing. “ _ You can do this. Be honest.” _

He knocked and the door was open immediately as if she had been just on the other side. “Fjord?” She frowned, pursing her lips. The concern painted across her face, made him just want to hold her tightly, carefully. 

For a moment, he just needed to be honest. “Jester, we-” Deep breath. “I was very afraid that, on that volcano, that was going to be the last moment I saw you.”

“It wasn’t.” She seemed to be incredibly interested in her shoes.

“I know, and I was really angry at you for leaving us for the first bit. Yet, I think I understand why you did it a little more. You would do anything for your friends and it is incredibly brave. I don’t think you get enough credit for all the things you do for the Nein, even the Traveller.” He was going far off of his plan now, but it was spilling out like a glass of milk she would order at a tavern. “Our little group, little family, is lucky to have you.”

“Really?”

He nodded. “We would follow you into the hells if you wanted, but you shouldn’t ever feel the need to pay for our mistakes.” The looming presence of Ukatoa was unspoken. 

“I didn’t want him to be alone,” she said, not objecting, only saying her thought process. “If all of you had each other, he would have  _ nothing _ .”

His mouth was going too fast for his head. “I don’t think I can stand by and watch you throw yourself into the line of danger, at least without the rest of us.”

“It was stupid,” she said, voice trembling. He couldn’t see most of her face, but he had only heard that tone a handful of times as she cried.

He instinctively pulled her into a hug, cheek resting against the top of her head, carefully avoiding the horns. 

“I’m sorry, Fjord,” her voice now muffled in his shoulder. “I really am.”

“Jester, you do so much good and we all care about you so much. I sure as hell do.”

Her breathing stopped for only a moment before she cried a little harder. 

“And you didn’t do anything  _ wrong _ . I think we all need to learn some self preservation skills.”

She pulled away, face only slightly damp. “Thank you for being there. Holding me before I left.”

“Of course.” He brushed her cheek with his thumb. “You know, you make me very nervous.”

She chuckled. “Who me?”

“Yes.” His stomach dropped.  _ Just ask _ . “Can I kiss you?”

It was a sheepish grin appearing before it quickly faded as she shook her head. “I- I don’t think that would be a good idea.” Her voice was just a whisper. “I’m sorry.”

He didn’t immediately run back to his room, contrary to what his embarrassment was telling him. He only gave her another quick hug. “It’s completely alright.” He tried to sound as genuine as possible because  _ of course _ it was alright. He never wanted her to feel like it wasn’t, but it didn’t mean his whole soul wasn’t itching to get away. “Get some sleep?” He pulled away.

“Okay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Entertainment's Here by AJR  
> Lots of Fjorjester for this chapter because I am super fond.


	6. It's my problem that I never am happy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They take a bit of a break in Nicodranas!

Caleb had been super excited to have Jester back to  _ finally _ show his friends what he created for them. He had mentioned wanting to do this before Molly died, and it was truly amazing to see the delight upon all of their faces. He didn’t need their praise to know he had done something wonderful, and frankly, hearing their compliments made him squirm. He had known he was capable of this, and it was nice to have the Nein receive his gift to them.

At breakfast there was a palpable uncomfort between some of the members of the party, but it was quickly abolished when different forms of waffles and pancakes came through the door.

“Is our first mission to head and get Artagan out?” Veth hopped up onto one of the chairs.

Jester spoke with a mouthful of donut, “w’ll, ‘e wa-” she gave up and swallowed her mouthful, now able to enunciate. “Well, he said that there is a certain time of month or something with the moon cycles, ironic, I know. Yet, if we wait two more weeks for both moons to be at full size the entrance to where the key should glow.”

“In the meantime, we should probably check in with the Gentleman and make sure everything is okay there.” Caleb said.

Veth nodded. “We kind of screwed the pooch on that one.”

“What do you mean?” Jester asked, voice getting low.

“When we left Molly in the grave, we left a note explaining how to get back to The Gentleman’s hideout,” Beau said. “The Jagentoths got to him, and the Gentleman’s business might be in danger because of it.”

“Oh gosh you guys,” Jester shook her head. “That’s really bad.”

“It sure is.” Beau.

“Ja.” Caleb

“Definitely.” Veth.

The others had a round of nods. 

“Okay, we go check in on my dad.”

Caduceus spoke up, “as long as we can get you out of here.”

Jester nodded, sinking back into herself.

“Well, we might as well try, yes?” Caleb found himself stepping in at the sign of Jester’s uncomfort. 

They all left the tower. 

“Will you be able to do that again? Or is it like stuck here?”

“I can do it again as long as I have the spell slot,” he responded to Jester, attempting an encouraging smile.

“ _ Cool _ .”

“Alright, everyone hold hands,” Caduceus instructed.

It was a funny feeling to be transporting and not be the one in charge of it. He was always the one drawing the circle, but watching Caduceus pull out the tuning fork received from the Trickfoots, it was a nice comfort. Everyone had their uses, and travelling between planes wasn’t Caleb’s.

They all ended up in the outskirts of Nicodranas, familiar walls surrounding it.

“We haven’t had to come in this way in quite a while,” Caleb observed. They had only had to go in this way once. The rest of the time has been through Yussa’s tower or the docks.

“Will that ever stop being so disturbing?” Mollymauk shivered like a snake trying to remove its skin.

“Just wait until you teleport with Caleb,” Beau said. “It’s agitating in a whole other way.”

“He has once now, Beauregard.” 

Beau nodded. “Yeah, but it wasn’t like he was himself yet.”

Entering Nicodranas through the gates wasn’t nearly as terrifying the first time with Jester worried about being thrown out. They were known a little more now as the travelling party both attendees of the Lavish Chateau as well as participants of the negotiations of the war.

“I figured we’d come here to catch up with your mother, it’s been a while since we’ve visited friends here.” Caduceus said, facing Jester.

“I want to go see my family,” Veth said without any hesitation.

“Well, while you all go to the Chateau I figured I would check in with Master Yussa, if you would send him a message, Jester.”

“ _ Oh _ .” Her voice squeaked. “I don’t know if my magic is working again. I think I need to rest.”

Caduceus raised his hand. “I can message him for now.”

As soon as he got the response, they separated as Caleb wandered to the Open Quay, the rest of them going to Marion’s.

He knocked gingerly on the brick wall, only waiting a moment before the goblin opened the door, revealing the front room. “Oh, the master said that you’d be stopping by.”

Down the steps came Yussa, speaking with an older gentleman. “Well, I will look into it and see what I can do.” He glanced up as Caleb entered. “Ah, Mister Widogast, giving me prior warning. Appreciated.” 

“I do my best.”

The man left, giving Yussa and Caleb some privacy. 

“Well, I’ve heard you and your group have been quite busy.”

He nodded. “Yes, we have been.”

“You all failed to mention your involvement in the peace talks.”

“I promise we weren’t trying to withhold information, we were just very distracted that day.” The first thing he remembered was Essek, then the shopping and then Veth’s transformation. It was definitely a whole few days.

“I’ll take your word for it.”

Caleb nodded. “I was actually here to ask you about Ormid Hass.”

His head tilted a little bit. “Interesting.”

“I am hoping that we are at that level of trust now, yes? I have no intention of using any of this information against him. I am looking to go back to my roots in the Empire.” In reality, he researched both Allura and Yussa along with their mutual organization Arcana Pansophical. It felt a little bit manipulative, but if he was going to achieve his goals, he needed to  _ know _ who he could rely on. The Pansophical was an important piece of bringing him here. 

“I am very curious as to what your roots have to do with Ormid.” He sat down, pouring two separate cups of tea.

“Before I mention that, I do not know much about the Hall of Erudition.” He paused. He couldn’t get too much into this. It would be unreasonable to compare the learning process of all of Hass’ students to the select few chosen by Ikithon. “You mentioned that Hass was hard on his students, and that you understood why. I must inquire as to what makes you say that.”

He looked over him, golden eyes taking in everything, causing a sense of feeling extremely bare on Caleb’s part. “Well, I would consider him a very strict headmaster in the sense that his school is hard to get into as well as stay in. He challenges them in ways that might pull them from their comfort zone.” He clicked his tongue. “Nothing that you wouldn’t expect from an institution of higher learning.” 

“I was once a student from the Soltryce Academy and was what you would call a star student of Trent Ikithon.”

The body language changed only for a second, surprising Caleb that he even caught it. “I am not very familiar with Ikithon.”

“He’s creepy,” Caleb smirked, remembering the description Yussa had given. “I do not associate with him anymore in any sense. However there was a lot of training that I went through, and I am not alright leaving more young to be trained in such ways.” He clenched his jaw. He hadn’t expressed this to anyone outside of the Nein, but Trent was already aware of him. His fear of being found was less immediate, so the risk was less intense.

“Trained in what ways?”

“Do you know anything of the Volstruckers in the Empire?”

“I’ve heard stories. They are not related to any of my focuses.”

“They are put through inhumane conditions, are essentially tortured, and are manipulated into killing innocents. They are  _ children _ being forced onto the pyre for the sake of the Empire.”

Yussa didn’t speak for a solid moment. “You intend to go after the Assembly, then?”

“I,” pause, “intend to gather information on the Assembly for now.”

The elf frowned, probably the most expression he had given throughout the conversation. “You are stepping in dangerous territory, you know.”

He couldn’t help but laugh from the obviousness of the statement, an awkward chuckle. 

“I’d appreciate it if you’d keep me updated.”

Caleb nodded, slightly uncertain.

“I would expect nothing less from my ‘apprentice of sorts’.” His ears twitched, a grin now appearing on his face.

His face immediately warmed at the teasing. “I did not mean to overstep by insinuating-”

“You did not insinuate anything. You blatantly lied. Lucky for you, he only effect that it had was Allura’s teasing about it. I do not take apprentices very often,” he said, a continual smirk, “but I am invested in your progress.”

With that, they discussed his relationship with Hass, it was decently informative. Hass wasn’t a target or seemed like one of the cancerous parts of the Assembly, but even with the information from Yussa, he couldn’t rule Hass out.

He went back to the Chateau, unsure of whether to expect someone to be nude now that Molly was back in the party. 

Downstairs, Molly, Yasha, and Beau were watching the show. He assumed Jester was upstairs and Veth was with her family. He slid up next to Molly. “Where is Caduceus and Fjord?”

“Hey there, blue eyes,” he grinned. “They went to some lighthouse or something to do their  _ worshipping _ .”

“Ah.” He frowned. “Blue eyes?”

Molly only grinned. “You have blue eyes.”

“I knew that. Why did you point them out?”

The tiefling laughed. “They’re just very nice and bright on your face, Mister Caleb. Nothing you need to worry about, I promise.”

Caleb only shook his head, flustered under the attention.

Beau and Yasha decided to head to the fish market, discussing whether or not to grab something for Fjord.  _ That’ll be a mark that follows him until the day he dies _ .

Jester came running down the stairs into the room with them, frowning. “Where did everyone go?”

“Running errands,” Molly said.

“Well, my mama is going to perform and no one is here!”

Caleb tried to smile. “They have all seen her perform before, but we’ve got the one who has yet to see her. It isn’t out of lack of awe of your mother as much as it is the constant rush to get things done.”

“Okay,” she said, blowing a raspberry.

“If it helps, I’m quite excited to see your mother,” Molly cut in.

The crowd went silent at that, Jester making a quick gasp as everyone began to cheer when the Ruby of the Sea made an entrance, voice already beginning to fill the room.

Molly was only a few inches away from him, allowing Caleb to feel the tension rise in the purple body. He hadn’t said anything yet, so Caleb chose not to worry, only making a couple glances to the side.

“Her voice is amazing.” Molly whispered, sounding entransed. However, he didn’t relax, and the illusion of wonder seemed false with the clenching of his jaw. Molly, like Caleb himself, was always fidgeting and moving around and it was a quick tell to however he was feeling. It was something Caleb had made note of early on, so when his fingers that were on his knee stopped tapping, only to clench on his leg, Caleb finally stood up.

“Jester, will you excuse us?”

“Oh. Of course.” Jester, despite feigning innocence, likely was aware of the state Molly was in.

They exited the Chateau, noise quieting as they walked down the street. He had to all but drag Molly with him. There wasn’t any fight, just no movement at all. When he tried to let go of Molly’s hand, Molly grabbed his wrist, keeping it there. “Mollymauk? Will you take a deep breath for me?”

“I- ah-” 

“Deep breath. In,” he said, making an example to breath in deeply himself. “Out.” 

Slowly, Mollymauk came back to his senses, not saying anything for a very long time. “Sorry about that. I didn’t even realize how overwhelmed I was getting.”

“It is alright. I do not mind being outside where it's quieter.”

A forced laugh spilled from Mollymauk. “I’m quite fond of the noise, I just don’t really know what happened.”

“It will come back to you in time,” he tried to assure. “It is easy to lose yourself to horrible experiences. Do not rush yourself into a sense of normalcy.”

A sigh. “What makes you think you know so much about it?”

“Observation of you, mostly, and perhaps some experience of my own.”

“And what have you observed so far?”

“That you often find yourself without words, Mister Mollymauk. I can see it get caught in your throat as if you are remembering how to speak again. I see you become very tense and hyper aware when more than one person is talking at a time. You tend to reach out for any physical affection when struggling.”

At that moment, Molly realized his grip on Caleb’s arm and basically threw it away from him. “You can’t prove anything.”

“I don’t plan to prove anything.”

“Has anyone called you a know-it-all before?” Molly sneered.

“It has been a long time, but yes.” 

Molly chuckled.

“Would you like to head back inside? We could go see more things in the city, if you would prefer.”

Molly hummed, tapping his long fingernails against his chin. “I think a nice walk while the sun goes down sounds quite lovely.” 

He sent a message to Jester to let her know they wouldn’t return immediately. She gave a jovial response, but Caleb was sure he heard a bit of disappointment. Surely, she would forgive them.

Caleb never got the chance to have one on one time with Mollymauk before he passed. Although, he had always intrigued Caleb with his flashy and unforgiving attitude. It was easy to see it in full shine as shops were about to close and they peeked through windows to look at different jewelry, clothes and generally interesting trinkets. 

He was similar to Jester in the sense that he had a never ending curiosity with things. However, he was more reserved to said curiosities like Fjord. His abruptness with his unrelenting opinions was extremely similar to Caduceus. 

Half way through his observations he realized he was no closer to understanding how he should interact with Molly. The tiefling seemed content enough to drag him around and to ask people random questions.

“It’s strange,” he said to Caleb after pulling away from an older couple walking down the road back to their home. “Normally, I’d ask people if they wanted a tarot reading. I need to ask Jester for my cards back because I think she’s forgotten to.”

Caleb nodded. “It’s likely she’s gotten distracted.”

“Yeah,” he kicked a stray rock only to have it skid a few feet away. “You know what is getting increasingly irritating? Frankly, I should probably go to Yasha since she leaves all the time, but I feel as though I have no idea what anyone is talking about anymore.”

“I doubt you understood much previously.”

A devious cackle. “You’ve been around Beau way too much.”

“Probably, but it’s worth it,” Caleb said, fondness seeping into his tone. “But you are worried about having missed out on so much time?”

“I suppose that would be one way to put it. Makes me sound like an indigent child. Not sure if I like that. I don’t know. I’ve always been alright with knowing everyone’s had far more experiences than me. There’s not going to be enough time to fill me in on all of the stories in the middle of a battle or a reunion. Like with Jester’s… Friend?” He threw his hands up, only to wave them back down as he groaned.

“I might have something to ease that issue,” Caleb said. He had plenty of spells that could assist with telling the Nein’s stories. 

“Right now?”

“Ah no. When we get back to the Xhorhaus, I think.”

Molly grinned. “I’ve got to say, I like the anticipation.”

“Well, if I am anything, it is extremely suspenseful.”

They continued chatting, making a decision to come back tomorrow and get magic supplies for Caleb and replacement jewelry for Mollymauk. 

They split up into rooms to sleep in as they always did at the Chateau. Without Veth staying with them, Caleb felt a little bit out of his depth. He had shared a room with Fjord, who immediately was paired with Caduceus. Molly and Yasha shared a room and of course, Beau and Jester went to theirs. The sorrow of missing his halfling friend sunk in just a little more like a brand sizzling onto his skin.

He settled into his room, everything completely still around him. Most nights him and Veth didn’t even talk. In the early days, they were as far away from each other as possible, but since joining the Nein they would sleep curled up against one another. In reality, he loved the touch, it was very grounding, but it was rare for him to be able to trust anyone enough to allow that type of closeness.

He swung his legs over his bed, heading down to the bar. There weren’t any patrons, only someone cleaning off of the tables. He didn’t mean to listen in, not really. He had grabbed a bottle with the full intent of going back to his room to drink it, but heading up the stairs, Jester and Fjord entered the hallway.

“I wanted to apologize,” Jester whispered. It was odd to hear her be so timid.

“You have nothing to apologize for. I promise you it’s fine, and it doesn’t have to change anything if you don’t want it to. I don’t want you to feel guilty for being honest with me.” Fjord had an even tone, soothing tone. Fjord could put people to sleep with his voice when he wanted to.

“I wasn’t really being  _ honest _ ,” she said. “And I don’t want  _ you _ to feel bad either. I care about you a lot… Even in that way.”

“Jessie, you don’t owe me anything, not even an explanation.”

“But I want to give you an explanation.”

Caleb felt the wind knocked out of him the longer this conversation went on. He sunk against the wall at the base of the stairs. He would have popped open the bottle if he was certain it wouldn’t disturb them.

“I just don’t want you to feel like you have to.”

There was a long bit of silence.

“Okay.” He could basically hear her pursing her lips through the attitude. “But what if I want you to kiss me? Just not right now.”

Fjord chuckled. “How about I just try again, at the right time?”

“One adjustment.”

“What’s that?”

“ _ I’ll _ be the one to try again at the right time.”

“Sounds perfect.”

They must’ve separated since Caleb couldn’t hear either of them for an extended period of time. He eventually decided to ascend the stairs.

It wasn’t as if he ever thought he had a chance or would even take a chance to pursue Jester. Even if she saw him as a viable option, he was far too gone for someone like her. Yet, the jealous rotting in his stomach seemed to flow through him like it was in his blood. He genuinely wanted to be happy for his friends taking the first awkward steps into a relationship, but it was overwhelming.

Settling into his bed again, he uncorked the bottle and drank immediately from it. He wouldn’t consider himself an alcoholic, but he was well aware he wasn’t going to fall asleep sober with the anxiety and despair rolling through him.

They all gathered for breakfast, everyone deciding to go shopping in Nicodranas, excited to spend their money that they got from the slaying of Vokodo. Molly got his cards back, hugging Jester tightly at the new additions. 

“I hope I didn’t ruin them,” she muttered.

He tried to swing her around without success, as her feet stayed stationary on the ground. “I’m just sad that you saw my cards. It ruins the surprise.”

She pushed away from him. “Your art is so good, Molly! Why didn’t you tell me you could paint?”

He shrugged. “One of the many passing hobbies I tried to pick up.”

She giddily went on about different things she had liked about his cards.

“Thank you, dear,” he whispered, kissing her forehead. 

“Uh, Jester, could you send a message to the boat. Uhm, to see if they are in Nicodranas?” Yasha asked.

“Oh, I didn’t prepare that spell today! Sorry, Yasha.”

“It’s okay. I just wanted to see if I could get one of those, uh,” she waved her hand in front of her face for a moment. “Tattoos.”

Both Jester and Molly gasped loud enough to echo in the street. 

“A tattoo, Yasha?” Jester slapped her arm a little bit in excitement. 

They talked more about how she was going to get one down her arm, still attempting to keep the design a surprise. Luckily, they found their new boat docked and ready for them, despite not getting much help from the Nein with getting out of Rumblecusp. The Nein only checked in with them the night Jester disappeared. After ensuring the boat got out of the cave, the Nein travelled back to Wildemount.

Molly and Yasha stayed on the boat, spending time getting to know the crew. Once they got out, Caleb went to retrieve paper with Mollymauk like they had planned the day before. Caduceus and Jester went to go shopping for diamonds, and Fjord and Yasha got separated when distracted in one of the magic shops.

Mollymauk asked him about Veth’s family and the mysterious wizard, as well as different adventures in Nicodranas. Caleb happily retold the stories about the being underneath the city and stealing a boat. 

“ _ The Mistake _ ?”

“Well, we had that boat for a while, and then we acquired the Balleater.”

“ _ What? _ ”

“In reality, I feel a little guilty for making Fjord the Captain of the Balleater, but you know that it wasn’t  _ my _ doing.”

“Jester and Nott, I would guess.”

“Of course,” Caleb couldn’t help but smile. 

It was nice to have a relaxing day, not having to worry about any members of their little family. In all honesty, he was very nervous about Molly coming back to the group and how the chain reactions could cause their group to fracture. There was still a sense of fear in the fact that Molly didn’t know them all that well, especially with Caleb’s own history. He really didn’t expect to see a bit of himself in Mollymauk since they were complete opposites in his previous life.

For the most part, both of them being completely different reigned true. However, in recent days, Caleb couldn’t be the one to stand by watching a friend suffer through trauma in ways he previously did as well.

When everyone gathered a little bit after four o’clock back at the Chateau, Caleb realized he hadn’t seen Beau almost all day, who was organizing something in a back closet behind the bar when they arrived. “What do you have there, Beauregard?”

She let out a giddy laugh. “ _ Fireworks _ .”

“Like the ones from Hupperduke?” Molly jumped across to get a better look.

“More than just ones like those.”

Jester and Caduceus joined them a moment later. “I think I have a way to solve the problem with my dad.” She took in a deep breath. “You see, now is the perfect time for him to get back together with my mom!”

“Okay,” Caleb said, hoping to get a little bit more explanation.

“Hear me out. Veth suggested inviting them to Traveller con, which I actually liked a little bit. Getting them to the volcano would have been way too complicated, though. So, I was thinking what if it was just a party. They get invited as  _ esteemed  _ guests.”

“So we throw a party, what makes you think they would get together after something like that,” Beau said, pulling herself out of the closet.

“If my mom sings my dad is bound to fall right back in love with her, and it’ll be great.”

Caleb looked at the others, seeing their winces. “Jester, I don’t think it’s a bad idea entirely, but I think we need more specifics. Also, we need to check in with your father. I do not know if a mere party would be enough to get him out of his hiding place.”

Jester nodded, taking this in for a moment. “Should we head to Zadash, then?”

They glanced between each other. “We can do that, absolutely.”  
“Do what?” Fjord and Yasha came in, Fjord swinging his arm excessively. Caleb guessed it was an attempt to emphasize the ring now adorned on his finger. He was filled into the situation. “Oh, should we go grab Veth, then?” 

“Well, we can always ask her if she wants to come, right?” Jester said, frowning slightly, arms up in a tight shrug.

Stopping by the Brenatto household, Molly got to meet the other two halflings in the family. Luc was absolutely fascinated by the color and shining jewelry. “ _ Whoa _ .”

“Another very impressive friend, I see,” Yeza smiled in the uncomfortable way he did. Caleb could understand the overwhelming feeling of being in the vicinity of the Nein. 

He kind of wished that Yeza would get the chance to spend more time with the Nein members one on one, in hopes that they’d be less intimidating, but Caleb wasn’t about to interfere with Veth’s family.

After explaining the plan, Veth asked, “do you think you’ll be back soon? Or will you be staying in Zadash for a while?” She glanced back into the house, and the signs of hesitation made Caleb want to scream that they needed her with him. 

He fought the urge to just start drawing the circle below them at that moment. She deserved to have time with her family, and expecting Veth to go with them is absurd. The selfish part of himself didn’t care. 

In the end, she said, “it’s only been two days. If you don’t need me to see the Gentleman, I’d like to stay here.”

They all nodded, heading to a quiet spot without their last member. He drew out the circle to leave Nicodranas. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title from "Are You Satisfied" by MARINA
> 
> I'm going to go over what happened with Pike and Co. in Vasselheim in one of the future chapters, I promise it'll be important and gone over. Also just so everyone knows, I love one Dragon living in a tower on the coast. 
> 
> Thank you for reading! You're all amazing!

**Author's Note:**

> In reality this is just a fic that I've been planning and thinking about in my head. I want to get back into writing and I've had a very hard time recently. The grammar is probably horrible and I apologize for that. 
> 
> However, just to warn everyone this is a cross campaign fic. The Campaign 1 characters won't play a huge part, and I won't be writing from their perspectives. There are backstory crosses between the campaigns and I wanted to warn everyone. Also, this is a Mollymauk revival fic sort of, he will be relevant again and I'm completely ignoring the Eiselcross arc. I'm loving the arc and I'm super excited to see where it is going, but this is an idea I've had for a while before hand. 
> 
> Come scream at me [@canikeepmystick](https://canikeepmystick.tumblr.com/)


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